Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is often believed that music is a better way of keeping people of different cultures and age groups together. I agree with this opinion as music indulges a sense of connection between people hence helps to build a connection with each other.

Although music is generally considered as a source of entertainment, it has major relevance in building relationship among people. One main reason behind this is that music develops the sense of attachment between different cultures. For instance, if we look at the folk music of the state of Gujarat, their folk songs are very popular as people feel joy performing Garba (gujarati folk dance) on those songs. Many people from different states enjoy the vibe of garba during navratri as the overall environment in the event seems to be really engaging and delightful . Therefore, it also helps people to eventually understand the essence of their culture.Hence, music promotes the social cohesion among different culutres.

Moreover, people of different ages can also vibe together through music. To cite an example of this, I would say the devotional music concerts are quite popular nowadays and people especially the youngsters really enjoy being there along with the elders as people today love being in such environment to relieve their stress that they have through their hectic schedules. Thus, I believe music is a great way to foster a sense of community among people from different cultures and ages. Hence, music should be promoted to build the sense of belongingness among the people.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you agree that music can connect people across cultures and age groups, and both body paragraphs address these groups. The examples of Garba during Navratri and devotional concerts give the discussion relevant, specific support. This meets the task well, but the two strands are not developed equally: the cultural example explains how people participate and encounter a tradition, while the age-group example mainly says that young people and elders attend concerts to relieve stress. Explain more directly how shared listening or participation helps generations understand one another. The opening claim that music is a “better way” is also not explored through comparison, so a more precise explanation of the extent of your agreement would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph about cultural differences, one about age groups, and a concluding statement. The progression from the first example to the second is easy to follow, and signposts such as “For instance” and “Moreover” help readers identify the examples. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical because “Hence,” “Therefore,” and “Thus” repeatedly announce conclusions, and the final paragraph repeats the central claim rather than adding a distinct synthesis. Some links between ideas could also be clearer: explain how enjoying Garba leads to understanding another culture, rather than moving quickly from participation to cultural understanding. More varied referencing and smoother links between explanation and example would make the organisation feel more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range for the topic, including phrases such as “social cohesion,” “sense of community,” and “foster a sense of belonging.” These choices show an effort to use vocabulary beyond basic terms, and the meaning is generally clear. Some less common expressions are not used naturally or precisely, however: “music indulges a sense of connection” would be better expressed as “music fosters a sense of connection,” while “vibe together” is informal for this essay. There are also spelling and form errors, including “culutres” and “gujarati,” and awkward collocations such as “build the sense of belongingness.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations and consistent spelling, rather than adding more ambitious wording where a simpler phrase is clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses in “as people today love being in such environment” and conditional phrasing in “if we look at the folk music.” Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, and the errors do not generally obstruct understanding. Some grammatical inaccuracies remain, particularly with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries. For example, “a source of entertainment” is followed by “building relationship,” where a plural or article is needed; “their folk songs” has an unclear singular antecedent; and “in such environment” needs an article or plural form. Punctuation spacing is also inconsistent, especially before full stops. Check these patterns carefully and vary complex structures while maintaining control.

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