Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

A set of peoople believe that music is a great medium to bring people of diverse cultures and age groups together. This essay will evaluate this statement and express my opinion.

Music is an art form that has helped millions across the world to connect. It is a medium of expression for people to communicate what words cannot. Concerts have often proved that music has the ability to bring people from different backgrounds together. For example, I recently went to the coldplay concert held in Ahmedabad, India with my mother who had never heard a single song from their album. I noticed how not knowing every single word of the song did not matter because she was loving the atmosphere. While this was a personal instance, i also came across people in the concert who were from different cultures and ages. People were interacting and dancing strangers. This was a live example of how people despite not knowing the songs were rather more focused on enjoying the beats, the rhythm and the overall atmosphere at the stadium.

Taylor Swift is a reknowed singer who is known for bringing thousands of people together as a cult who are often reffered to as "Swifties". The crowd in her concerts dresses up together, hosts community events despite the differences in their culture. The older generation is often the age group that is spotted at her concerts where she plays romantic teen songs. The ratio of people who show up explains how music brings people together.

Finally, i believe that while difference in taste and genre of music could lead to people listening music alone, music is a peaceful way to bring diverse cultures, age groups and genders together.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that music can connect people across cultures and ages, and you support it with relevant concert examples. The Coldplay anecdote is particularly effective in showing how shared enjoyment can matter even when listeners do not know the songs. The Taylor Swift example also supports your view, although the claim that older people are often present at concerts playing “romantic teen songs” is not fully explained, and the essay could clarify more directly how these examples demonstrate connections across cultures as well as age groups. The brief concession about differing musical tastes adds balance. To develop the response further, explain the mechanisms behind these connections and extend each example rather than relying mainly on description.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two supporting paragraphs, and a concluding statement. The examples are grouped sensibly, and transitions such as “For example” and “Finally” help readers follow the argument. However, progression within the first body paragraph is sometimes loose: the shift from your mother’s reaction to people from different cultures, then to dancing and enjoying the atmosphere, repeats a similar point rather than building it step by step. The second paragraph also moves quickly from Swifties’ shared activities to the presence of older concertgoers. Use clearer links to show how each detail supports the central claim, and make references such as “the ratio of people” more specific so the reader can follow the reasoning without guessing.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “medium of expression,” “different backgrounds,” “genre,” “rhythm,” and “atmosphere.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and some less common expressions show an effort to vary your language. However, several spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, including “peoople,” “reknowed,” and “reffered.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear, such as “dancing strangers,” “hosts community events,” and “as a cult.” Aim for more accurate collocations and precise wording; for instance, describe people “dancing with strangers” and a fan community rather than a “cult.” Proofreading spelling and checking whether phrases sound natural would make your vocabulary more controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “my mother who had never heard a single song” and a concession in “while difference in taste and genre … could lead…”. Meaning is generally clear, but some grammatical errors remain. Examples include “people … were … dancing strangers,” where the sentence structure is incomplete, and “music … lead to people listening music alone,” which needs a grammatical construction such as “lead people to listen to music alone.” There are also inconsistent capitalisation and punctuation choices, including lowercase “i” and sentence-initial “coldplay.” Work on complete clause structure, articles and prepositions, and consistent sentence punctuation. More accurate control of these forms would strengthen the varied structures you already attempt.

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