Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Numerous individual believe that music is a beneficial way of bringing people of various culture and ages together . In my opinion , I completly agree with this statement because music bring the more tourist and it also protect the cultures in the own country .

The primary reason of music are save the many cultures and traditions and its also helps to the economy in the coutry . This is because , many people making the song with realated to our cultures and many foreigners visiting the more area and learned the many music . For instance , A tourist went the other countries they invest the more money to learned new music and explore the areas . As a result , it also promotion inside the country and day by day tourism secters are rise in the country .

An additional reason for my instance is that music also take the good memory and vibes . When people listning the music they can learn for something and used in daily life . for example , if any function and event coming ,people playing the music in the speaker and dancing with the friends and relatives . As a result people save the memory and they cannot forget this movement also government also invest the more moneyt in the music sectors .

In conclusion , Music is very important in the life its also bring the mnay tourist and growth the economy .However , people create the many memory and save the own cultures .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear: you say you completely agree, and you give two reasons related to tourism and shared experiences at events. The examples of visitors learning music and friends and relatives dancing are relevant to the topic. However, the response only partially addresses the central claim about bringing people of different cultures and ages together. Much of the first body paragraph focuses on tourism and the economy, while the connection between music and people forming bonds across age groups or cultures is not explained. The second paragraph mentions shared memories, but this idea remains general. Develop each reason by showing specifically how music helps people connect, and support it with a clearer example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Paragraphs broadly group related points, and linking expressions such as “For instance,” “As a result” and “In conclusion” help signal examples and outcomes. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the first moves from cultural preservation to visitors, investment and tourism without clearly connecting each step. Some transitions are mechanical or do not express a clear relationship, and the conclusion repeats earlier claims rather than drawing them together. Use topic sentences that state one main reason, then explain and illustrate it in a logical sequence. Clearer links between sentences would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “cultures,” “traditions,” “tourist,” “economy” and “music sectors,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making meaning unclear. For example, “music bring the more tourist” and “music also take the good memory and vibes” do not express the intended ideas naturally; “save the many cultures” is also an imprecise phrase. Spelling errors such as “completly,” “listning” and “coutry” further reduce accuracy. Build a bank of natural phrases for cultural connection and shared experiences, and check spelling and word forms when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with reasons and examples, using structures such as “This is because…” and “When people…”. However, control is limited, and errors occur frequently in basic sentence patterns as well as in longer attempts. Examples include “Numerous individual believe,” “music bring,” and “people making the song,” where agreement or verb forms are incorrect. Articles, plurals and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent, as in “the other countries” and the run-on construction beginning “In conclusion, Music is very important in the life its also…”. These errors can make the reader work to understand your meaning. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and complete sentence structures before adding more complex clauses.

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