Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Few people believe that music is a good approach to gather people from different heritages and age groups together at one place. In my opinion, I totally agrees with the statement that the music plays an important role in individuals lives to interact with the new people.

Firstly, festival is the one of the major reason of social gathering, where the cultural songs are played. The people who lives in different cities can come together at one specific place to enjoy the occassion. Also, people who belongs to different age groups can experience this environment where the traditional and cultural songs are played. For instance, the festival such as garba, urges people from different states to join together at one place where the songs are played, people enjoy them by dancing together with the help of sticks.

On the other hand, concert halls are also responsible for the people to brimg together. People of different age groups who lives in other states are invited to attend music programs which are held at amphitheathres. In addition to this, various culturals songs are sung by the singers to attract the people from multiple age groups. For example, if the music performance by A.R Rahman is performed at the specific location, then people around the different states of India gathers together to attend the copncert.

To conclude, muic refreshes the minds of people and gve energy to them and also attracts people from different age groups

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear in the opening: you say you “totally agrees” that music brings people together, and the festival and concert examples are relevant to the question. However, the response addresses the idea only partially because the reasons are brief and largely describe people gathering, rather than explaining how music helps people of different cultures and ages connect. The Garba example could show how participants share a cultural experience, while the A.R. Rahman example could explain what different generations or communities have in common. The conclusion repeats that music refreshes and attracts people but does not fully draw together your argument. The response is also seven words below the required minimum, so it needs a little more development as well as the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “Firstly” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This makes the main direction easy to follow. However, the progression within paragraphs is limited: each example is introduced, but its connection to the central claim is not developed. “On the other hand” suggests a contrast, although concert halls provide another supporting example rather than an opposing point. Some links are also repetitive, particularly the repeated references to people gathering “at one place.” Use transitions that show addition or illustration, and make each paragraph follow a clearer sequence of claim, explanation, and example. The final sentence is incomplete in its development, which makes the ending feel abrupt.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “cultural songs,” “festival,” “concert halls,” and “age groups,” so the reader can understand the subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are unnatural, such as “a good approach to gather,” “social gathering,” and “at one specific place.” Spelling errors—including “occassion,” “brimg,” “copncert,” and “muic”—also make the writing less polished. Some expressions are repeated rather than varied, especially “people” and “together.” Aim for more precise language about shared experiences and cultural exchange, and check spelling carefully. These improvements would make your ideas clearer and more natural without changing your relevant examples.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses beginning with “where” and “who,” but control is inconsistent. Errors occur frequently in basic agreement and verb forms: “I totally agrees,” “people who lives,” “people who belongs,” and “people … gathers” should use forms that agree with plural subjects. Articles and sentence patterns also need attention, as in “festival is the one of the major reason” and “if the music performance … is performed.” The final sentence lacks a complete, clearly connected structure. These errors sometimes make the reader pause, even though the overall meaning is usually recoverable. Practise checking subject–verb agreement, singular and plural nouns, and article use, then proofread each sentence for a complete grammatical structure.

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