Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

People think that music is a good way to close the people of different culutres and ages. I will tell my opinion after analyzing the following paragraphs. Some how i agree that music bring close people of different countries and cultures.

First of all music is an art that used for relaxing himself and some people have passion for singing. They cannot live without music,without singing. Today music is very commen in our modern era.Every country has lots of artists according to music , they hve lots of musians. For progressive countries they held music consurts to present their culutres. In our world every country has its own local language and they represent thier culutre by language. And they show it by singing.

Secondly there is a compition between all countries to sing beautifully .some use it for passion and for earning money. Simply when there is a need of singer people contacts with other different countries to sing for best singing. And this way people get close to this country.they reach to acess their culutures easily as they sing thier own language .Singers also trie to sing in other comparison language so they get close to each other. For example in films or dramas ots they have to tried different types of languages.

To sum up i agree that music can play important role in bringing close to different people of different culutres and ages together. No doubt it is also true that it is important economically.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You give a clear, though qualified, position: “Some how i agree” and the conclusion confirms that music can bring people together. Your discussion of singers performing in other languages and music representing local cultures is relevant, but the response only partly addresses the question. The age dimension is mentioned in the opening and conclusion but never explained, and the economic point at the end is not developed as support for your view. Examples such as films and dramas are too vague to show how music connects people. The response is also two words below the required minimum. Develop both cultural and age-related reasons, and support each with a specific example to make the argument more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “First of all” and “Secondly,” and a concluding paragraph. This helps the reader identify the main stages of your answer. However, progression within the paragraphs is uneven: the first moves from music as relaxation to artists and national culture, while the second shifts between competition, earning money, international singers, and films. Some links are repetitive or unclear, such as “And this way” and “they reach to acess their culutures.” Use topic sentences that state one main reason per paragraph, then explain and illustrate it in order. Clearer references to who “they” means would also improve the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “cultures,” “artists,” “local language,” and “passion,” and you attempt to discuss music’s cultural and economic roles. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make ideas difficult to understand, for example “close the people,” “a need of singer,” and “access their cultures easily.” Spelling errors such as “culutres,” “commen,” “musicians,” and “consurts” are noticeable and reduce clarity. Aim to learn accurate phrases for expressing connection and cultural exchange, and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain how music brings people together rather than relying on repeated forms of “close” and “culture.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use mostly simple sentences, with some attempts to join ideas using clauses, as in “when there is a need of singer people contacts with other different countries.” The meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in sentence structure and grammar are frequent. For example, “music is an art that used” needs a passive verb form, and “music bring close people” has a subject–verb agreement problem and an incomplete expression. Articles and plurals are also inconsistent, as in “a compition” and “different types of languages.” Capitalisation and punctuation need attention, particularly the lowercase “i” and missing spaces after commas and full stops. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns before adding longer clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.