Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It ia an indeniable fact that music facilitate to bring people closer from distinct cultures. While Some individuals argued that music is an best approach to bringing people from various regions and ages together. I partially agree with this statement, owing to somewhere it has validity, language barrier might an issue in this case.

To begin with, which significant factor helps to close people each other from different cultures. One of the primary reason is universal appeal of music. Everyone adore music without any thinking is this is from their religion or not. People from different countries can enjoy the same songs and musical performances because mostly time, some people have fascinated to explore and listen different music and when try to listen together it help to think same.

However, it also has some conflicts and one of the main drawback is language barrier. To illustrate, in the recent years, age gap plays an essential role in every field, whether they are listening music togther or not. Mostly people claim that if they listen music they can get closer with various people who are coming different religions. In actual, language barrier restrict people to close each other because everyone has different choices and preferences. One clear evident is this genz generation listen hip hop music, older people prefer old school music and adult prefer bollywood songs and limitse people to get closer each other. Hence, language restriction restrict people.

In conclusion, although music help people to bringing to create bond with each other from different religions for has some validity. However, i firmly believe that language restriction stop people to get closer eahc other.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a position—“I partially agree”—and discuss both music’s ability to connect people and possible barriers, so the response is relevant to the question. However, the position is not consistently explained: the introduction mentions language barriers, while the main counterargument shifts between language, age, religion and differing musical preferences. The example contrasting Gen Z’s hip-hop with older people’s music could support a point about age differences, but it does not clearly show why music fails to bring people together. The claim that people enjoy music regardless of religion is also broad and needs a specific example or explanation. To strengthen the response, define the extent of your agreement clearly and develop two focused reasons with relevant support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “However” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of the argument. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven: the second body paragraph moves from language barriers to age gaps, religions and preferences without clearly connecting these points. Some linking phrases are repetitive or do not express the relationship accurately, as in “Hence, language restriction restrict people.” The conclusion repeats the main ideas but does not resolve the tension between your partial agreement and your claim that language prevents people from getting closer. Organise each paragraph around one main idea, then use clear references and transitions to show how each example supports it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “universal appeal,” “language barrier,” “musical performances” and “preferences.” These choices show an effort to discuss the issue beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited and several word-choice or collocation problems make meaning unclear, such as “helps to close people each other,” “everyone adore music” and “limitse people to get closer.” There are also noticeable spelling and form errors, including “indeniable,” “togther” and “eahc.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations and avoid repeating “language barrier” and “get closer” without variation. For example, you could use “connect people,” “shared musical experiences” and “differences in musical taste.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer structures, including a concession beginning “While some individuals argued…” and a contrast introduced by “although.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in basic sentence construction and agreement occur frequently. For instance, “music facilitate” needs subject–verb agreement, while “language barrier might an issue” is missing a verb. The sentence beginning “To begin with, which significant factor…” is not a complete question or statement, and “although music help people to bringing…” combines incompatible verb forms. Articles and plurals also need attention. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses; check that each sentence has a clear subject and verb and that verb forms agree.

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