Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many people argue that music can unite people of diverse backgrounds such as ages and cultures. I largely agree, as shared songs create a connection that words often cannot.

One key advantage of music is that it crosses language barriers to a great extent, since emotion and rhythm can be understood without words. For instance, BTS performs mostly in Korean, yet its concerts around the world attract huge crowds. Not every fan understands the lyrics, but they all love the same artists.

Another great way is concerts of these famous artists. People of different ages and background go to these concerts. Many people use music on different occasions like family wedding and functions. For instance, i personally love old songs from my parent's youth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You give a clear position in the introduction—“I largely agree”—and your points about music crossing language barriers and bringing generations together are relevant. The BTS example supports the first point, while your reference to enjoying songs from your parents’ youth begins to illustrate the age-related aspect. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: the second point is not explained enough to show how music actually connects people of different ages, and the examples are brief. The required minimum of 250 words is not met, which leaves too little space to develop your reasons and examples. Extend each main idea with explanation and a specific example, and make sure both cultures and ages are addressed fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph about language barriers, and a paragraph about concerts and family occasions. Linking phrases such as “For instance” help signal examples, and the ideas are generally understandable. However, progression is limited because the final paragraph moves quickly from concerts to weddings and then to your personal preference, without explaining how these points connect. “Another great way” is also unclear about what “way” refers to. Use a topic sentence that states the paragraph’s central idea, then develop it in a logical sequence: claim, explanation, and example. A brief concluding paragraph would also help the response feel complete.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “diverse backgrounds,” “language barriers,” “emotion,” and “attract huge crowds.” These choices are relevant and show some range beyond very basic wording. However, the vocabulary is not always precise or natural: “another great way is concerts” is awkward, and “family wedding and functions” is unclear and imprecise. There is also repetition of general terms such as “people” and “music,” which limits flexibility. Aim for more exact expressions when describing how music connects listeners, and check collocations and plural forms. The suggested alternatives can help you express the same ideas more naturally without changing your meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You show some ability to use both simple and complex sentences. For example, “I largely agree, as shared songs create a connection that words often cannot” combines a clear main clause with subordinate clauses, and the sentence beginning “since emotion and rhythm…” explains a reason effectively. Most of the meaning remains clear. However, there are errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms, including “Another great way is concerts,” “different ages and background,” and “family wedding and functions.” The personal pronoun “i” should also be capitalised. Work on making sentence patterns complete and checking agreement, articles, and plural forms. Adding a wider range of accurately controlled sentences would make your ideas easier to follow.

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