Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Generally, the issue on whether music is a unifier or not has been greatly contested. Many people argue that songs help solve the problem of ethnic segregation while others opine that it rather fosters divison. This essay will address the two extremes of the conversation, in support first and against later. However, I am of the firm opinion that music is the greatest human unification tool in a multi-cultural society.

Music is colloquially referred to as "the medicine of the soul', regardless the genre. Humans across all strata are in constant quest of that which calms the soul and quietens the turbulence of life. This quest for serenity in itself attracts and unifies people from all walks of life through music. However, some people device other means to escape the troubles of life but this doesn't delete the importance of music in this regard.

The problem of cultural diversity has been greatly solved by the different genre of music evolution. For example, Reggae which was originally arributed to the Jamaicans have successful trickled down other cultures, making room for tolerance of foreign cultures without discrimination. Music is also one of the greatest tools that potray and preserve culture by means of its lyrics.

Nevertheless, music has been attributed to increased crime rates across several societies as the lyrics contained in some genre of music have serious debilitating effects on customs and traditions which inadvertently tears down instead of uniting people.

Furthermore, individuals who are not creative minded, will make little or no use of music. This makes music more or less not useful in unifying these category of people.

In conclusion, although music has been presented as the medicine of the soul and the important unification tool in a multi-lingual society, the downsides of its ability to heighten crime rate still remains. However, in my opinion, the enormous benefits of music in uniting people cannot be overemphasized. in my opinionargument on whether music is a tool for unifying rather than tearing t

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall position: music is, in your view, a powerful means of uniting people, while acknowledging possible disadvantages. The reggae example is relevant and helps show how music can introduce one culture to another. However, the response only partly develops the task’s focus on bringing together people of different cultures and ages. Age differences are not discussed, and the opposing points about crime and people who are “not creative minded” are asserted rather than explained or supported with examples. The opening promises to address both sides, but the discussion does not fully establish how the disadvantages relate to cultural or age-based unity. Develop fewer points in more depth and connect each directly to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate supporting and opposing paragraphs, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “For example,” “Nevertheless,” and “Furthermore” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression is sometimes mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is not always clear. The claim that music can increase crime is introduced without showing how this counters its role in bringing cultures or generations together. The paragraph about people who are “not creative minded” also feels disconnected from the main argument. In the conclusion, the final sentence is disrupted by the fragment “in my opinionargument on whether music is a tool…”. Use clearer links between claims and the question, and proofread the ending.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range and attempt less common expressions, including “ethnic segregation,” “serenity,” “tolerance,” and “debilitating effects.” These choices show ambition, and the main ideas remain understandable. Some wording is inaccurate or unnatural, however, such as “device other means” for finding relief, “genre of music evolution,” and “trickled down other cultures.” There are also spelling errors, including “divison,” “arributed,” and “potray,” which reduce precision. Phrases such as “the greatest human unification tool” and “not creative minded” are also awkward or unclear in this context. Aim for natural collocations and check spelling, especially when using less familiar vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses such as “although music has been presented…” and “as the lyrics contained in some genre…”. Most of the argument can be followed, but some grammatical errors affect clarity. For example, “which was originally attributed to the Jamaicans have” has a mismatch between the singular subject and verb, while “these category of people” needs plural agreement. The sentence beginning “Music is colloquially referred to…” also has an incomplete construction around “regardless the genre.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries are problematic in the final line, which runs into an unfinished fragment. Review agreement, articles and complete sentence structure, then proofread punctuation.

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