Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, people often listen to music because they feel really relaxed and refreshed after listening it. A certain group of people say that it is also a best way to bring people together from different backgrounds and age groups. This essay concours with the given statement because it improves cultural knowledge and brings happiness regardless of ages.

To begin with the first cause of agreement with the aforementioned opinion is that it provides the knowledge of traditions. To explain it, individuals often feel happy when they listen to music but when they listen the music from different country or state they might be curious to learn more about the music and its cultural importance. In addition, Different music allows person to interect with different types of people. To give an example, according to a report by the BBC it was found that people who partcipated in musical concert, often learned about the other types of music that were available in other parts of the country.

Additionally, the another aspect that leads to agreement is the chance of reduction in generation gap and bring happiness. When people listen to music they simply enjoy it without considering the age of others. Moreover, it is also seen that in family functions, family members were interested in dancing on the stage and at that time they only focused on the enjoyment not the age. To quote an instance, a report of the Times of India it was found that in India during family functions most of the family members enjoy music and dancing together.

To conclude, this essay has dicussed that music allows us to expand our cultural knowledge and creates lively atmosphere among people without considering their age. So this essay has the same understanding that music is a good way to bring people together from other cultures and ages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that music can connect people across cultures and ages, and you give two relevant reasons—learning about traditions and sharing enjoyment across generations. The examples of concerts and family functions help illustrate these points, so the response addresses the task. However, the cultural-learning idea is explained more fully than how music actually brings people from different cultures together; the concert example mainly describes learning about other music. The family example supports the age-related point, but it could explain more directly how shared participation builds connection. To strengthen the response, develop each reason with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and a specific, relevant example. Your conclusion restates your view consistently, though it adds little beyond the introduction.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting separate reasons, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “Additionally,” and “To conclude” make the progression easy to follow, and the reader can distinguish the cultural and generational arguments. At times, however, the linking is mechanical, with repeated formulae such as “To explain it,” “To give an example,” and “To quote an instance.” Some references are also unclear: “the another aspect” does not point smoothly to the previous discussion, and the relationship between learning about music and bringing people together could be signposted more explicitly. Use a wider range of natural transitions and connect examples directly to the claim they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “cultural knowledge,” “traditions,” “generation gap,” and “family functions,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “aforementioned opinion” and “reduction in generation gap,” but some expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. Spelling errors such as “concours,” “interect,” “partcipated,” and “dicussed” are noticeable, while phrases such as “a best way” and “other types of music” are either incorrect or too general. Aim for accurate collocations and more precise wording rather than adding formal-sounding phrases. Proofreading spelling and choosing natural expressions would make your ideas clearer and more fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “when they listen to music from different country or state they might be curious” and a contrast with “but.” This gives the response some variety, and the main ideas remain understandable. However, errors occur in articles, agreement, verb forms, and sentence construction. For example, “a best way” needs an article or a different construction, “when they listen the music” is missing a required preposition, and “family members were interested in dancing” shifts awkwardly into the past when describing a general situation. The opening sentence also needs “after listening to it.” Review article use, prepositions, and consistent tense, then check each complex sentence for a complete and clearly connected structure.

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