Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Other Citizens argue that,Music is the nest way of reuniting members of separate culture as well as ages of being together.I strongly believe,as Music is on of the particular entertainment on which most people inspired of.
Music as one of entertainment in te
he world,it plays a big role in people's life.During Music show either Gospel or Secular,Both Childrens and adults are always there to dance or simg as well desipite their age gap and as well as ethics they belong.For instance each and every they organise music sand festival,qt this place alot of musician take part to perform,and moreover there is no restrictions about age,as we know the country can not have singers of one tribe even audience of similar age,as the result people from those tribe comes together and enjoy.In addition and in cinemas you will find people of different age and culture enjoying themselves which is good interms of unity.
On the other hand, Desipite music being popular entertainment among people of different age and culture.But still more others have limitations due to their culture,For example some district do not allow community to participate in particular music, according to their culture,they believe that taking part in those lusic show its a tabule.As for age,due to old age other people can not take part to some music show or songs due to the lyrics of the song.As we all know that lyrics of nowdays are totally different from old days.
In conclusion,Music promote uninity among people of different age and culture as well.However,some culture believe that listening or watching Other kind of music is sin,and according to age group,due to lyrics of modern music are differ from old ones so some adults ignores new songs as they prefers old ones.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You give a clear overall view that music can unite people of different ages and cultures, and you also acknowledge limits, such as cultural restrictions and older listeners’ preferences. The examples of music shows, festivals and cinemas are relevant to the question. This covers both the positive claim and a qualification, but some points are not fully explained: for example, the festival example does not show clearly how music brings different groups together, and the point about lyrics is repeated in the conclusion without being developed. To strengthen the response, explain the mechanisms behind your examples and make your degree of agreement explicit and consistent throughout, rather than relying mainly on the opening and conclusion to state it. The ideas are relevant, though some are less fully developed than others.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph supporting music’s unifying role, a contrasting paragraph, and a conclusion. This gives the reader a general route through your argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow, and linking phrases can be mechanical or confusing. For instance, “On the other hand, Despite…” creates an incomplete contrast, while “In addition and in cinemas” does not clearly connect the next example. Some references, such as “those tribe,” are also unclear. Use one clear topic sentence per paragraph, then develop each point in a logical order. Choose linking expressions for their precise function and check that each sentence connects clearly to the one before it.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “entertainment,” “lyrics,” “culture,” “age gap” and “unity,” and you attempt more specific expressions such as “Gospel or Secular.” However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or spellings make parts difficult to understand, including “reuniting members of separate culture,” “simg,” “desipite,” “tabule” and “uninity.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “people inspired of” and “music sand festival.” Build a reliable set of collocations for discussing social effects—for example, “bring communities together” and “attend a music festival”—and proofread spelling and word forms. More precise vocabulary would help you express your examples without relying on repeated general terms such as “people” and “music.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including clauses introduced by “For instance” and “as we know,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, sentence boundaries and grammatical patterns are not consistently controlled. For example, “Despite music being popular entertainment… But still more others…” is an incomplete construction, and “Music as one of entertainment in the world, it plays…” has a faulty opening structure. There are also errors in articles, plurals and agreement, as in “one of entertainment,” “Both Childrens,” and “people from those tribe comes.” Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and article use. Vary sentence structures, but prioritise accuracy when combining ideas.
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