Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In present days, music has become the part of the people's lives. A few people say that music is a good way to bring people with different culture and ages together. While others argue that it is not much important in our daily lifestyle. This essay will discuss both the view points including my opinion.

On the one hand, listening to music freshens the mood and refreshes the energy while doing the tasks. In many parts of the world, groups of people organize music sessions to show thier culture and traditions. Although, it may become the reason of nuisance to some people but most of the people enjoys the energy. It makes people to connect with each others, for instance, a group is playing a genre of music in the park and the people who loves to listen to that type of music joins them and socialize with each other. There are some special places like clubs, concerts and parties where people usually go to enjoy music. In addition, music is the main reason to celebrate something, wether it can be anything, either festivals or an event.

On the other hand, when it comes to music, people with different age groups and different culture or religions have different tastes. Thus, playing music in public areas can cause noise pollution and may hurt someone who are not related to it. On accounting of the past situation, it can become the reason to hate somebody and can spread negativity arround it.

On a final note, in my opinion, music allows people to express and makes the bond stronger but it should be limited in public areas taking other people's feelings in mind.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the topic and give a recognisable position: music can strengthen bonds, but its use in public should respect others. The examples of people gathering around music in a park and attending concerts are relevant. However, the response spends substantial space presenting both sides without fully developing how music specifically bridges differences in culture and age. The opposing point about noise and differing tastes is clear, but “On accounting of the past situation” is difficult to understand and does not explain how music might create hatred. To strengthen the response, explain the mechanisms and give a more specific example, such as people of different generations sharing a song or participating in a cultural festival. The conclusion could also state your degree of agreement more directly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs and a concluding opinion. Signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand” and “On a final note” help readers follow the structure. Within paragraphs, however, ideas sometimes move by association rather than developing a clear central point. The first body paragraph shifts from mood and energy to cultural sessions, nuisance, socialising and celebrations, so the link to bringing different ages and cultures together is not consistently maintained. Some connections are also awkward, particularly “On accounting of the past situation.” Group related examples and explain how each supports your main claim; clearer referencing and more precise transitions would make the progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “culture and traditions,” “noise pollution,” “concerts” and “express.” This is enough to communicate the main ideas, but several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. For example, “freshens the mood” and “refreshes the energy” are not natural combinations, while “the main reason to celebrate something” overstates music’s role. There are also spelling errors such as “thier,” “wether” and “arround,” and “view points” is usually written as one word. Aim to use familiar expressions accurately before reaching for more elaborate phrasing, and proofread spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “Although” and “when,” and the overall meaning is generally understandable. However, errors in agreement, articles and sentence construction recur. Examples include “most of the people enjoys” (subject–verb agreement), “people who loves” and “someone who are” (agreement), and “makes people to connect” (verb pattern). The opening phrase “In present days” also has an article/preposition problem. Some sentences are awkwardly joined, as in “Although, it may become the reason of nuisance to some people but…”. Practise accurate agreement and verb patterns, and punctuate subordinate clauses correctly; these improvements would make your varied sentence attempts more controlled.

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