Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A majority of people have the opinion that music is a good opportunity to bring people close to each other, having various traditions and age groups.I partially agree with this opinion as, music brings people of various cultures and traditions from all over the world close to each other. At the same time it removes age difference among people.Meanwhile, too much listening takes a man into the world of fantacy.

Music is a source to bring people closer, despite of belonging to different countries, having distinct cultures and traditions, and a variety of languages spoken.People just listen music, they don't care either the song belongs to their culture or not.For instance, International music festivals are attended by a vast majority of visitors throughout the world.Moreover, expos are also arranged to welcome a bulk of communities.In these festivals a person can listen the music of different cultures , and their traditions as well.

Moreover, music is also responsible to bring closer to the people of different ages like youngsters, adults and old people as well.Music is not bounded to any sort of age group.Any music lover can enjoy any song according to his desire and taste.For example, a significant number of people attend music concerts.People of different periods of life has a chance to come close to each other on such occasions.These concerts are not age bounded.So they are the best source to come close to each other.

On the other side, addiction of any thing is considered as an evil.Those whom are addicted to music listening, always seems to be lost in parallel universe.They get bore from daily chores very soon, and found relief in music only.It also damages ear drum, that leads to hearing loss.

To conclude, I would say that music is a good medium to bring people closer to each other having different cultures and ages, but too much listening of it can be bad for our mental and physical health as well.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you partly agree because music can connect people across cultures and ages, while excessive listening may be harmful. You address both sides of this view and support the cultural point with international festivals and the age-related point with concerts. These examples are relevant, but they are described generally; explaining how people interact or share traditions at these events would make the support more convincing. The paragraph about addiction introduces a related qualification, but it is not fully connected to the question of music bringing people together, and claims about isolation and hearing damage need clearer explanation. Develop the main benefits more fully and keep the counterpoint focused on the extent of your agreement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs on cultural and age-related connections, a counterpoint, and a conclusion. This logical arrangement helps the reader follow your position. You also use linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “For instance,” and “To conclude,” and the two main supporting points are easy to identify. However, some transitions feel mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “Moreover,” and “On the other side” does not connect the health paragraph smoothly to the central argument. Some references are also unclear, as in “their traditions” after mentioning festivals and music. Use a wider range of natural transitions and make links between examples and claims more explicit to strengthen progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “distinct cultures,” “music festivals,” “music concerts,” and “hearing loss,” and you attempt some less common expressions. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “a good opportunity to bring people close,” “a bulk of communities,” and “addiction of any thing.” Spelling errors such as “fantacy” and “bore” also reduce accuracy. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding your main ideas, but they make the expression less precise and sometimes awkward. Build a reliable set of collocations for discussing social connection and health, and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the contrast in “I partially agree … At the same time” and the relative clause “which leads to hearing loss.” The overall meaning is generally clear, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “People just listen music” needs an article or a different construction, while “People of different periods of life has” has a subject–verb agreement error. There are also problems with sentence boundaries and punctuation, such as missing spaces after full stops and commas, and the opening sentence has an awkwardly attached participial phrase. Review articles, agreement, verb patterns, and punctuation, then proofread each sentence for a complete and accurate structure.

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