Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A few people state that music is an efficient way to gather people of various cultures and different ages. I completly agree with the statement as it is having numorous benifits with music.

In everyday life, music play a vital role in many aspects. Music gather people at a place also culture sharing can be done with music. Now a days, bhajan jammings are conducted here and there in cities. A lot of people are intrested to attend this irrespective of their origin. Everone gather and pray for god. Here, music act as a medium to bring people of various cultures at one point. Resulting in sharing of their culture.

On the otherside, music attract people of different ages at a single platform. Everyone are intrested in participating concerts irrespective of age and gender. For instance, Dandiya event conducted at my community brought every individual to one place. At the time of event everyone participated in dance without consideration of age and enjoyed alot. By stating that age is not a considerable point to dance for the sounds.

At my point, there are many advantages of music. That made people to gather irrespective of age and culture. In support to that music in a day can encourage to work and relives stress.

I conclude by, music can bring every individual at one stage and end up in sharing culture and enjoying irrespective of age. Also it is very important to maintain motivated throughout the day by acting as a stress boster.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the opening: “I completely agree,” and the response addresses both cultural differences and age groups. The examples of community bhajan gatherings and a Dandiya event are relevant and help show how music can bring people together. However, the cultural-sharing point is explained more clearly than the age-related point, which mainly says that people of all ages attend and dance. The final claim that music relieves stress is relevant to music’s benefits but does not directly support the question about bringing people together. Develop each main reason with a clearer explanation of how music creates interaction, and connect the conclusion more closely to your central argument.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs about culture and age, and a conclusion. This makes the overall line of argument understandable. You also use signposting such as “For instance” and “I conclude.” However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. “On the otherside” introduces the second point, but “Resulting in sharing of their culture” is a fragment and does not clearly connect to the preceding sentence. The conclusion repeats earlier claims rather than drawing the two reasons together, and “At my point” is an unclear transition. Use complete sentences and clearer links between each example and the claim it supports; this would make the progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “cultures,” “participating concerts,” “community,” and “stress,” and the examples make your meaning generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the reader pause. For example, “music gather people at a place” and “music act as a medium” do not sound natural in English, while “stress boster” appears to be an incorrectly formed expression. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “completly,” “numorous,” and “intrested.” Build a more precise set of phrases for describing shared activities and cultural exchange, and check spelling and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the main message can usually be followed. However, control of sentence structure and basic grammar is inconsistent. Examples include “music play a vital role,” “Music gather people,” and “music act as a medium,” where subject–verb agreement is missing. “Everyone are interested” also has an agreement error, and “I conclude by, music can bring…” is not a correctly formed sentence. The fragment “Resulting in sharing of their culture” further shows difficulty joining ideas into complete clauses. Practise agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries, then check each sentence for a clear subject and verb. More accurate control of these patterns will make your ideas easier to read.

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