Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In my own perspective, I would say music has bought people of different cultural background and ages together in so many ways. Music is considered an effective ways of joining people and it creates opportunity for people to interact.
Firstly, music helps people to appreciate cultures which is different from their own. For instance, Nigerian Afrobeats is different from the jazz song in different countries but it has gained popularities across all nations e.g America, United Kingdom and South Korea. People from these countries now enjoy Afrobeats when they did not know the lyrics. This has proven to us that music can solve language barriers and unite nations together.
Secondly, music brings together people of different ages, young or old. We have gotten to the generation where the old begin to have interest in our music especially during celebrations where there are mixtures of both young and old. For example, during a birthday party where music is used as an entertainment, everyone move along with it neglecting the age difference.
There is one important thing to note, people choice varies, not everyone likes a particular music but even with that it does not stop the connection it brings between people of diverse nation. The rate at which music brings people of different cultural background is limited but it does not nulify the connections and memories.
In conclusion, I stand on my ground that music can unite people from different cultural background in respective of their age or the language being spoken.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
Your position is clear from the opening: you agree that music brings people of different cultures and ages together, and the conclusion restates this view. You address both parts of the topic, using Afrobeats’ international popularity to discuss cultural connection and birthday celebrations to illustrate interaction across generations. These examples are relevant, but the age-related point is less fully explained: “everyone move along with it” does not show in detail how music creates meaningful connection between age groups. The paragraph acknowledging that preferences vary and that cultural influence is “limited” introduces a qualification, but its significance is not clarified. To strengthen the response, explain the mechanisms behind your examples and develop this qualification so the extent of your agreement is more precise and consistently supported.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, two body sections address culture and age, and a conclusion returns to the central claim. “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” make the main stages easy to follow. The progression is generally clear, although the paragraph beginning “There is one important thing to note” shifts from age differences to music preferences and cultural influence without a clear link to the preceding example. Some connections are also expressed mechanically, particularly the repeated use of “people” and “music.” The reference in “even with that” is understandable but could be more precise. For stronger cohesion, connect the qualification directly to your argument and use clearer transitions to show how each example supports your position.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range to discuss the topic, including “language barriers,” “diverse,” “appreciate cultures,” and “connections and memories.” These choices help communicate your main ideas, and the examples of Afrobeats and jazz give the response relevant topic vocabulary. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “effective ways of joining people,” “gained popularities,” and “the rate at which music brings people.” There are also spelling or form errors in “bought” for “brought” and “nulify.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding your argument, but they reduce precision. Aim for more natural combinations such as “an effective way to bring people together” and check word forms and spelling during revision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the contrast in “People from these countries now enjoy Afrobeats when they did not know the lyrics” and the concession beginning “not everyone likes a particular music.” The overall meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors recur. Examples include “different cultural background” where a plural form is needed, “everyone move” instead of “everyone moves,” and “people choice” instead of a possessive form. Tense and clause choices are also awkward in “when they did not know the lyrics.” These errors show that control is not yet consistent, even though they rarely obscure your ideas. Review subject–verb agreement, plurals, possessives, and tense consistency, then proofread each sentence for accuracy.
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