Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Music is an art of creativity and relates to people. To my view of perspective I totally agree with the fact that this is one of the best way to come close with different cultured of people of different ages together.

Music is something that was created from very early days. When people used to live for survival, they ofter burn woods and make a campfire and then started to make sound with different materials with using their vocal cords matching their rhythm and harmony together. I have read a book where the writer told that music brings peoples' souls together and make them comfortable. This also applies in this modern era.

Talking about modern era and music, it is a common and most effective activity to bring people close. Especially in parties and rave culture. One of the example is a friend of mine invited me to her house party but I was totally new to the people and the environtment. But when the DJ came in and started playing music, everyone showed up on the floor and started dancing. That moment a guy asked me to start dancing with him and I eagerly joined him. From that day that guy is still one of my good friend.

But music is not for every people or culture. Many different religoius belivers don't like musics and try to avoid it which is totally valid. In some sense this could make a certain people anxoius and nervous. For instance, a muslim community people are not into music. This can hurt their sanity.

After all, music remins as a activity to make people comfortable and more joyful. There are various music genres came from different countries and people. I believe this makes people more closer and always will in general.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the opening: you strongly agree that music can bring people of different cultures and ages together. You support this with a personal party example, showing how dancing helped you connect with someone unfamiliar, and you also acknowledge that some people may avoid music for religious reasons. These points address the task, but they are not equally developed. The party anecdote is specific, while the historical account is speculative and does not clearly demonstrate how music connects different cultures or generations. The claim about Muslim communities is also too broad and needs careful qualification and a more relevant example. Develop these points with clearer explanations of how music crosses age or cultural differences.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, supporting paragraphs, a contrasting point, and a conclusion. The progression from music’s origins to a modern social example and then a qualification is generally understandable. However, some links feel mechanical or unclear, such as “Talking about modern era and music,” and the conclusion repeats the general claim rather than drawing together the main reasons. References such as “This” in “This also applies in this modern era” do not specify exactly which idea is being carried forward. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each paragraph explicitly to the question of bringing different cultures and ages together. More precise referencing and less repetition would make the overall progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “rhythm and harmony,” “rave culture,” “genres,” and “religious believers,” and the personal example is easy to follow. There are also attempts at less common or expressive language, such as “souls together,” though some combinations are unnatural or imprecise. Errors such as “different cultured of people,” “one of the best way,” and “music remins as a activity” show inconsistent control of word forms, collocation, and spelling. The phrase “hurt their sanity” is particularly unsuitable for describing discomfort or religious objections. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and avoid broad claims when a more precise phrase is available. Proofreading spelling and word forms would also improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a time clause in “When people used to live for survival” and a contrast introduced by “But music is not for every people or culture.” Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. For example, “this is one of the best way” has a number-agreement problem, while “a friend of mine invited me” is followed by “that guy is still one of my good friend,” where the noun phrase is not correctly formed. There are also tense and sentence-construction problems in “There are various music genres came from different countries.” Practise accurate agreement, articles, plurals, and verb patterns, while retaining your attempts at longer sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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