Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diagrams demonstrate a newly opened public park in 1920 as compared to the same park as of today.
Overall, the GRANGE PARK has changed completely throughout all these years except few things which are still the way they were back in 1920.
Firstly, the both entrance has stayed the same except a new additional entrance for the underground car park. In the very center, there was a large fountain which is now replaced by sitting area for visitors. The stage for musicians has eventually upgraded to an Amphitheatre for concerts. Before, there was total of three rose gardens of which two of the one is replaced by a cafe and on second place its empty, Nothings there.
In addition, the pond for water plant is superseded with children play area. Last thing was the glasshouse which is now renewed into a beautiful water feature which offers a splendid view. Not forgetting that back in the 1920 park there was seats to sit and relax on five different places which are all now settled around the rose garden in the center.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the park in 1920 and today, identifying key changes such as the fountain, the stage, and the rose gardens. However, the description is somewhat mechanical and lacks a clear, analytical overview of the transformation. While the main features are mentioned, the reporting is occasionally imprecise, such as the vague reference to 'Nothings there' regarding the rose garden area. To reach a higher band, you should focus on grouping the information more logically—perhaps by categorizing changes (e.g., additions vs. removals) rather than listing them feature by feature—and ensuring the overview highlights the most significant trends, such as the shift from a formal garden layout to a more recreational space.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'In addition', and 'Last thing'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed. For example, the transition between the rose gardens and the pond is abrupt. Additionally, some referencing is unclear, such as 'two of the one is replaced', which makes the relationship between the original features and the new ones difficult to follow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'superseded', 'renewed', and 'amphitheatre'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'the both entrance', 'on second place its empty', and 'Nothings there'. These errors occasionally distract the reader. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring that your vocabulary is used in a grammatically correct context. Expanding your range to include more sophisticated descriptive language for spatial changes would also help elevate your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'the both entrance has stayed' (subject-verb agreement), 'two of the one is replaced' (incorrect structure), and 'there was seats' (should be 'there were'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, pluralization, and the correct use of articles. Practicing the construction of complex sentences with accurate punctuation will help you demonstrate better control over your grammar.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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