Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The plans below illustrates a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Overall, the park has undergone major refurbishment. In this essay we will note the changes took place in Grange park before and after reconstruction.
In the year 1920 and at present there are two entrances remains same from Eldon Street and Arnold Street. Furthermore, In present time Fountain is replaced by the Rose garden and seats surrounding all the four sides of the Garden which is situated in the centre of the park. A new underground car park has been constructed which can be accessed from the Eldon Street. In contrast, when we enter from Eldon Street on the right side Glasshouse is replaced with Water feature and on the left side Rose garden, Stage for musicians have been converted into Amphitheatre for concerts. The entrance from Arnold Avenue has also undergone significant changes, on the left side Rose garden and Pond for water plants has been converted in to Cafe and Children's play area, on the right side Rose garden remains at the exact same spot but the seats are removed.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
You have successfully identified the main features of the park in both 1920 and the present day. You provided a clear overview of the major refurbishment and made relevant comparisons between the two time periods. However, the response lacks a clear structure; the information is presented in a somewhat cluttered manner, making it difficult to follow the spatial changes. To reach a higher band, ensure you group features logically (e.g., by location or type of facility) rather than listing them in a way that feels slightly disjointed. You covered all parts of the task well, but the organization of the data could be more analytical.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is coherent overall, but the paragraphing is insufficient. You have only two paragraphs, with the second paragraph containing a dense list of changes that would be better served by being split into smaller, thematic sections. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Furthermore' and 'In contrast', the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as when you mention 'the right side' without clearly anchoring the reader to which entrance you are referring to at that specific moment. Improving the use of paragraphing and signposting would significantly enhance the logical progression of your report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You have an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'refurbishment', 'constructed', and 'amphitheatre' appropriately. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'the changes took place' (should be 'the changes that took place') and 'in present time' (should be 'at present'). You also repeat 'Rose garden' and 'entrance' frequently. To improve, try to use synonyms or refer to features by their function or location to avoid repetitive phrasing. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. For example, 'The plans below illustrates' (subject-verb agreement error) and 'there are two entrances remains same' (incorrect verb form). Additionally, there are issues with article usage and punctuation, such as missing commas after introductory phrases and incorrect capitalization of 'Fountain' and 'Garden'. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage (present perfect for changes, present simple for descriptions) will improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.