Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the provided diagram that presents difference between public park when it first time opened in 1920 as well as the similar park nowadays .

overall, grange park transformed from a traditional green space with the fountain and musician stage in 1920 into a modern are featuring an amphitheatre ,cafe and children ground today.

The original stage for musician was replaced by amphitheatre for concerts and the rose garden are in same 1920 and today . The central fountain was removed to make new rose garden in square shape and seating place around us. The pond for water plants was converted into a children's play area.

moreover, The rose garden was turned into cafe near about entrance in front side. The glasshouse area was modified into water features was construced near by new entrance.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the ability to fully develop the response. While you have identified the main features of the park's transformation, the description is somewhat brief. You have successfully highlighted key changes, such as the replacement of the fountain and the addition of the amphitheatre and cafe. However, the analysis lacks sufficient detail to reach a higher band. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive overview and expand on the comparisons between the two time periods, ensuring all parts of the prompt are addressed in sufficient depth.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate, such as the use of 'moreover' to start the final paragraph, which does not logically connect the preceding information. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the lack of sufficient length makes the overall flow feel somewhat disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more naturally, ensuring that each transition serves a clear logical purpose.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but remains quite basic. You use some relevant terms like 'amphitheatre', 'fountain', and 'glasshouse', but there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'children ground' instead of 'children's play area' and 'near about entrance'. These errors do not completely impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your writing. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more precise collocations and descriptive language to convey the changes in the park more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'the provided diagram that presents difference' (missing articles), 'musician stage' (should be 'musicians' stage'), and 'water features was construced' (subject-verb agreement error). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with irregular spacing around commas and periods. While the meaning is generally understandable, these recurring errors indicate a need for more careful proofreading and a stronger grasp of basic sentence construction and article usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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