Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The plans below illustrates a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.
Over the provided park plan it is clear that there was a mapped structure of grange park in 1920 arnold avenue . Starting with the entrance there was a rose garden on the right side. Here we can enjoy with the different colours of roses and we do have a pond for water plants . Beside of pond ,seats are available, here people can relax comfortably by admiring the park. After the seats it had glasshouse and another entrance for eldon street . At the same park there were two entrances which are facing towards each other . At the centre of the park there was a stage for musicians and a fountain which made the park look more adorable.
In comparison to today the grange park arnold avenue has well developed. Starting with the entrance of arnold avenue there was a cafe where people can have snacks , tea and coffee. Beside the cafe children's play park was there . Furthermore there was a water feature behind it there was another entrance for underground water park facing outside. In addition it also has amphitheatre for concerts. At the centre of the park it has rose garden with plenty of seats.
Finally, there is a difference in 1920 and today's grange park with more entertainment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the park in 1920 and today, but the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identify key changes, the comparison lacks precision. For instance, you mention the rose garden moved to the center, but you do not clearly contrast the overall layout changes or the reduction in green space. The description of the 1920 park is a bit narrative rather than analytical. To improve, focus on grouping features logically (e.g., entertainment facilities vs. nature areas) and ensure the overview highlights the most significant transformation, such as the shift from a nature-focused park to one centered on entertainment and amenities.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and repetitive sentence structures. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Starting with', 'Furthermore', and 'In addition', the flow between sentences feels mechanical. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as 'Beside of pond' or 'After the seats it had glasshouse', which makes the spatial relationship between features difficult to follow. Improving the use of cohesive devices to link ideas more fluidly and ensuring clear referencing would significantly enhance the clarity of your report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic descriptors like 'adorable' or 'well developed', which are not ideal for describing architectural or landscape changes. There are also some issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'mapped structure' and 'underground water park' (which likely refers to a water feature). To reach a higher band, focus on using more specific terminology related to maps and urban planning, such as 'transformed', 'replaced by', 'situated', or 'adjacent to'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The plans below illustrates'), missing articles (e.g., 'it had glasshouse'), and incorrect preposition usage (e.g., 'Beside of pond'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar prevent the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and article usage will help improve your accuracy significantly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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