Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-08
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In today world everyone have their own perspective to learn things and take the things in their own way but we all are human being and we are not perfect like some students want to learn about other subject in additions to their main subjects its good like I have already completed my bacholers from the University of management and technology i did BBA in supply chain management from there we study a lot of subject of business finance Human resource Management Accounting Supply chain management they teaches me a lot of business subjects and as well as economics subject its not nessecceary for them to teaches us the subject of engineering medical or other related field subjects just focus on the business or career chosen field to be perfect we can be perfect and do everything everyone plays a specific role in this world like in my opinion its ok if they teaches us the subjects related to AI and other courses which play a role to make easy our work and knowledge like in my 3 university semester they teaches us so unnesseccary subject like pak studies islamiyat and for continously 3 semester they teaches us english subjects from my example you have taken the idea that just focus on your professional career realated field you dont need to interfare in the other subjects which didnt play a role in your practical life and job Qualification play a role in your job to get some therotical idea rather than teaches you about the practical life just be focus on your skill rater than on your study courses.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both views and providing an opinion. However, the development is limited. The argument relies heavily on personal anecdotes rather than broader academic or professional reasoning. The structure is problematic, as the entire essay is presented as a single, long paragraph, which hinders the clear presentation of ideas. While the position is clear, the supporting arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack the depth required for a higher band. To improve, you should ensure each viewpoint is explored in a separate paragraph with distinct, well-supported arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay lacks paragraphing, which is a fundamental requirement for a coherent academic response. The text is essentially one long run-on sentence structure, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of ideas. There is a lack of cohesive devices; the transition between the two viewpoints and your own opinion is abrupt. You rely on repetitive phrasing like 'they teaches us' and 'play a role', which creates a mechanical feel. To improve, you must use clear paragraph breaks and a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'conversely', 'consequently') to connect your ideas logically.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic terms such as 'subject', 'perfect', and 'play a role'. There are several spelling errors (e.g., 'bacholers', 'nessecceary', 'therotical', 'interfare') and word-choice inaccuracies, such as using 'interfare' instead of 'interfere' or 'distracted by'. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of variety and the persistent spelling errors limit the score. To improve, focus on learning synonyms for common words and pay closer attention to the spelling of academic terminology.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The grammar is significantly underdeveloped. The entire essay consists of a few extremely long, run-on sentences lacking proper punctuation. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'everyone have', 'they teaches us') and tense usage. The lack of full stops makes it difficult to identify individual sentence structures, and the absence of complex sentence forms prevents a higher score. To improve, focus on writing shorter, grammatically complete sentences. Ensure that subjects and verbs agree and practice using commas and periods correctly to separate distinct thoughts.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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