Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Views of university students .

majority of commentators claim that learning different subjects should be encouraged rather than just simply doing major in a single field .

both the opinions are fine in my opinion as it varies from person to person , one maybe diversed in nature but another could he persueing for the sake of qualification . so in this essay we would be analysing both the commentries . Example similarly, friend of mine is unable to select his stream so he would be weighting on contast subjects rather than just selecting single stream . His intrest relies on science but could'nt do maths as the course is BiPC .

On the contrary another good illustration of this would be my campanion of myself has shown effection on cemistry as he is awesome into but unable to do due to being stuck on fighting the biology .

in my point of view , education is an walk in which particular must no be forced or dragged from where he dosent belong . Attitudes of vibrant sects must be felt welcomed and be honoured to according to who their are .

infact intention of the pupil must be acquiring knowledge based on the love of his thoughts rather than just getting a wholesome of cash .

To recapitulate both groups of ideas must be respected and given freedom of choice in their life to be flourishing according to the changes in environments and tecnology for their growth in career as well as daily lives .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You express a general view that students should have freedom to pursue their interests, and you refer to both studying broadly and focusing on a qualification. However, the two positions in the question are not explained clearly or developed as arguments. The examples about friends choosing science, mathematics, and biology are difficult to follow and do not show why studying additional subjects or concentrating on a qualification is beneficial. Your opinion becomes clearer in “education is a walk in which particular must not be forced,” but the essay does not consistently connect this view to the task’s alternatives. To strengthen the response, explain the advantages of each approach, then state which you favour and support that position with a relevant, clearly explained example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response, including an opening, a contrast signalled by “On the contrary,” a personal viewpoint, and a concluding phrase, “To recapitulate.” These markers show awareness of essay structure. However, the progression between ideas is often unclear: the two friends’ examples overlap, and the reader cannot readily see how they illustrate the opposing views. Several sentences contain multiple ideas without clear links, while the opening fragment, “Views of university students,” does not establish a focused introduction. Use separate paragraphs for the two views and your opinion, and make each paragraph’s main point explicit before adding an example. Clearer references and simpler transitions would help the argument develop coherently.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt a range of topic-related and less common vocabulary, including “qualification,” “acquiring knowledge,” “freedom of choice,” and “career.” However, basic and repeated wording, together with inaccurate or unnatural choices, often makes the meaning difficult to understand. For example, “weighting on contast subjects” and “shown effection on cemistry” do not communicate the intended ideas clearly; “vibrant sects” is also unsuitable for describing students with different interests. Spelling errors such as “intrest,” “cemistry,” and “tecnology” further reduce clarity. Aim for precise, familiar academic expressions and check spelling. For instance, describe students as “exploring other subjects” or “focusing on their degree programme,” rather than relying on unclear phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts some longer sentence forms, such as “both the opinions are fine in my opinion as it varies from person to person,” and uses clauses beginning with “rather than” and “as.” However, sentence construction is frequently inaccurate, and errors sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Examples include “one maybe diversed in nature but another could he persueing,” “my campanion of myself,” and “education is an walk in which particular must no be forced.” There are also problems with articles, agreement, verb forms, and punctuation, including inconsistent spacing around punctuation and sentence boundaries. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with one clear subordinate clause. Proofread each sentence for a complete subject and verb, correct articles, and clear punctuation.

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