Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Opponents say that some students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects, While proponents are against with them and they beleive that it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. In my point of view learning other subjects in addition to their main subjects can be helpful for the students and they can gain knowledge on another field like according to their interest they can learn other subjects if they are more passionate about their career. Both the views will be discussed in the following essay.

To commence with the opponents they say that some college students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subject. Because few students are more eager to learn and gain knowledge in todays generation due to increase in technology. Since, while going to university if they have different interest then what actually they are learning in the university than it would be helpful for them to get into their interest career job after graduating from the university.

Moreover, Proponets believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Such as, if the students got stuck into other subjects they might be leave the university and won't go to the college regularly because they will be losing the interest in their regular subjects. In the end they won't get a proper qualification just they will be left out with the courses which they had done paralelly during the university.

In conclusion, education is compulsary but it totally depends on the individuals either they are being more ambition regarding other subjects while learning their regular subjects.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify both views and state a preference for learning additional subjects, so the response is relevant to the question. However, the discussion is minimal: the benefit of pursuing an interest is mentioned, but not illustrated with a specific example, while the concern that students may lose focus is asserted rather than explained. Your final sentence also makes the opinion less clear by saying the choice depends on individuals without restating your preference. The response contains 218 words, below the required 250; the 66 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop each view with a clear reason and a relevant example, then give a consistent conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The response has an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion, which gives it a basic overall structure. Some linking expressions, such as “Moreover” and “In conclusion,” help signal the stages of the essay. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow: the first body paragraph moves from technology to students’ interests and then to career jobs without clearly connecting these points. “Since” and “Such as” are also used in ways that do not clearly introduce complete supporting ideas. The conclusion adds a qualification rather than resolving the discussion. Organise each body paragraph around one main claim, explain it, and connect the example directly to that claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to education and study, including “qualification,” “gain knowledge,” “interest,” and “career.” This is enough to communicate the general topic, but the range is limited and several expressions are repetitive or imprecise, particularly repeated references to “other subjects” and “main subjects.” Some collocations are awkward, such as “get into their interest career job” and “stuck into other subjects,” which make the intended meaning less clear. There are also spelling errors, including “beleive,” “Proponets,” and “compulsary.” Build a more varied set of accurate academic phrases and check spelling; for example, describe students as “pursuing a career related to their interests.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “if” and “because,” and the reader can generally understand the main points. However, complex structures are often faulty, and sentence boundaries and punctuation are inconsistent. For example, “Because few students are more eager to learn…” is a fragment, while “Since, while going to university…” combines clauses in a confusing way. In “they might be leave the university,” the verb form is incorrect, and “if the students got stuck…” shifts tense in a general argument. There are also agreement and article problems, as in “the students… their main subject.” Use complete sentences, keep verb forms consistent, and check clause structure and punctuation.

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