Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some believe that it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. The students have a big dreams to achieve the future goals and also support their family to work hard and struggle for future and working hard and it give their time to study to gain more knwoledge. I believe that the students who give the proper time to study the student not defeat in anywhere or anyplace therefore the hard working come true and also motivate and give confidences to the stduents to achieve their goals. For example the student have a dream to make a doctor so they need to practices more and more working hard and steadfast at almost 20 hours give to their study after that the hardworking and practices become true and the student can achieve the dream. Practices make man perfect if he student going to university attend proper lecture and give the time to study the student is a genius and sincere with study because some students have dream to fulfill all the dream of mom and dad.

On the otherhand the student who can attend proper lecture and spend their time in different activitives so the student can become a successful person in his life. Time is very significant in this period therefore studnet can choose the subject like science but they have a interest in other subject so hwo they become a sucessful person and fulfil her dreams its not possible.

In my opinion the student are successful in his life who sincere with study and make the books her friend and give the proper time so i believe that one day the student become more successful and generous. If you work hard then the hard working is not waste and give the piece of fruit in your life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both views and state a preference for giving proper time to study, with relevant examples such as a student aspiring to become a doctor and students’ interest in subjects beyond their main field. However, the discussion is uneven: the first view receives more attention, while the case for studying other subjects is only briefly suggested through choosing science while being interested in another subject. Your position is present, but it is not consistently explained or supported, and several claims—such as hard work making a dream come true—remain general. Develop each view with a clear reason and a specific example, then explain why you ultimately favour one approach. The 16 words copied from the task prompt were excluded from the length count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response into paragraphs for the two views and your opinion, and transitions such as “On the other hand” and “In my opinion” help signal the direction of the essay. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow because several ideas are joined together without clear relationships. For example, the opening moves from family support to gaining knowledge and then to confidence without explaining how these points connect. Repeated references to “the student” also make the flow mechanical, while “therefore” and “and also” do not always show a precise logical link. Give each paragraph a clear main point, arrange supporting explanation and example in order, and use referencing and linking phrases more selectively.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary is basic and repetitive, but it includes some relevant terms such as “qualification,” “lecture,” “subject,” and “achieve their goals.” The repeated use of “hard work,” “dream,” “student,” and “successful” limits precision and makes several points sound similar. Some word choices or combinations are unclear, including “give the piece of fruit in your life,” “not defeat in anywhere,” and “make the books her friend”; these expressions make the intended meaning difficult to identify. Spelling errors such as “knwoledge,” “stduents,” “studnet,” and “sucessful” also affect clarity. Build a more accurate range for discussing academic choices, benefits, and outcomes, and check spelling and natural word combinations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response relies mainly on simple clauses and repeated sentence patterns, with limited control of more complex structures. Errors are frequent and sometimes make the meaning hard to follow. For example, “The students have a big dreams” has problems with article and number agreement, while “the student not defeat in anywhere” lacks an auxiliary and has an unclear construction. In “the student have a dream,” the subject and verb do not agree, and “they need to practices” uses the wrong verb form after “need to.” There are also long sentences joined with “and” that need clearer punctuation and clause boundaries. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries before adding more complex structures.

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