Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-07-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.
Why might this be the case?
What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
The changes in the societal trends often stems the changes in people's interest towards the choice of their career paths. A lot of people in the recent times choose to be self-employed rather than working under somebody. Just like any other aspect of human life this surely has certain drawbacks as well which will be discussed further in this essay.
One of the most prominent reasons for such a dramatic shift with regards to employment is rooted within the big aspirations of the people. Everyone in this age craves for a sense of authority over themselves. People want to discover the peaks of their potential which cannot be achieved by enslaving somebody. They want to be their own CEO and work according to their convienience rather than being stuck in the vicious corporate cycle. The most successful businessmen in the world like, Bill Gates and Elon Musk, are a great example for this.
Regardless of the wonders that self-employment has to offer, it is not the same case for everyone. Only a few can succeed due to their consistent hard work and scholarly intellect. Such practice comes with the need of a lot of investment, both financial and personal. The person has to be insanely disciplined and has to give enormous amount of time to their growing business, which will led to a poor work-life balance. The health of the person might deteriorate as well sue to lack of physical activity and rise in mental stress. If this plan does not workout the person can suffer from massive financial crisis which can make them crawl back to that corporate life.
In conclusion, the people of the modern age believe in taking risks and being their own boss, which indeed shows utter courage and strong willpower which often results in success. Nonetheless, this often leads them into a crisis they might not be ready for, so it is important to be self-aware before taking anything life-changing decisions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for choosing self-employment and the potential disadvantages. The ideas are relevant and generally well-developed. For instance, the discussion on the desire for autonomy and the risks of financial instability provides a clear perspective. However, the development of the 'reasons' section is slightly hampered by the use of extreme language, such as 'enslaving somebody,' which is an over-generalization of corporate employment. To reach a higher band, ensure that arguments are balanced and supported with more nuanced reasoning rather than hyperbolic statements. Overall, the position is clear and the task requirements are met.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized into four paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Regardless of the wonders' and 'In conclusion,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the jump from the benefits of self-employment to the specific mention of Bill Gates and Elon Musk is a bit abrupt. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of ideas is generally easy to follow, though the logical links between sentences could be more sophisticated to achieve a higher score.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some attempts at less common items like 'vicious corporate cycle' and 'scholarly intellect.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'stems the changes' (should be 'stems from') and 'sue to' (a typo for 'due to'). The phrase 'enslaving somebody' is also stylistically inappropriate for an academic essay. While the range is sufficient to convey meaning clearly, the occasional errors and slightly informal tone in certain sections prevent a higher score. Expanding the range of precise, academic collocations would be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is a good attempt at using complex sentences, such as 'If this plan does not workout the person can suffer from massive financial crisis which can make them crawl back to that corporate life.' However, there are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('stems the changes') and punctuation errors (missing commas in conditional sentences). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Increasing the variety of error-free complex structures and refining punctuation would improve the overall grammatical control.
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