Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.
Why might this be the case?
What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Recently, many individuals prefer to be self-established, rather to work in a government agency or organisation. In this essay, i will be discussing the cause and the disadvantages of this self-employed.
Overall, some people choose to be self employed because of many reasons, for examples,under payments and stress. Moreover, it can bring some damages to the societies like unemployment, lack of people to take over governments established industries or firms.
Some people prefer self established nowadays rather than working in a firm or company because self employed allow them to monitor and managed their companies themself. Furthermore, they will not be worried of not paying salaries on time or even owing them their salary, for instance,in Nigeria today, Government hardly pay monthly salary on time, and most of the time they do owned their workers for months. Also, most people see it as the faster and the easiest way to become rich, since most of the organisations don't pay their staff well.
On the other hand, people focusing on self established causes some damages in the communities. Unemployment is one of it, for instance, few weeks ago, a bread industry were looking for workers to work in their factory but they couldn't find because nobody want to work in a company again. It will also make the government agencies like FERMA, FADAMA and others to lack most of the experience staff to hand over the agency in the nearest future.
In conclusion, while self employed will help individuals to established themself, make money faster and will be able to manage their own company, but i believe that it will cause more damage in the future.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for self-employment and the disadvantages. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide a relevant example regarding salary delays in Nigeria, the explanation of the disadvantages is less convincing. For instance, the claim that self-employment causes a lack of staff for government agencies is a bit underdeveloped and lacks a strong logical link. To improve, ensure that each point is fully explained with clear reasoning rather than just stating the idea. The position is clear, but the overall depth of analysis needs to be increased to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'On the other hand' to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and the flow between sentences can be disjointed. For example, the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'Unemployment is one of it'. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to previous nouns will enhance the logical flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are frequent errors in word formation and collocation. You repeatedly use 'self-established' and 'self-employed' incorrectly in terms of grammatical category (e.g., 'the disadvantages of this self-employed'). There are also errors such as 'government hardly pay' instead of 'the government hardly pays' and 'they do owned their workers' instead of 'they do owe their workers'. To improve, focus on learning the correct word forms (nouns vs. adjectives) and common collocations. Expanding your range of vocabulary beyond basic terms will also help you achieve a higher score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'self employed allow them'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'they do owned'), and punctuation errors. There are also issues with articles and pluralisation, such as 'a bread industry were looking'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tense usage would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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