Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-20
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.
Why might this be the case?
What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this modern age, individuals usually tend to start their own business rather than working under someone. This essay will discuss this perspective why people choose to do so and explain what the drawbacks are of being self-employed before explaining why believe that self-employment is a better decision.
On the one hand, in this fast-paced-world people highly motivated to have their own business, one of the biggest reasons is to earn more money acquire numerous benefits. in addition, people prefer to live a comfortable life rather than a fearful life by doing work under an organization if there commit any mistake. For example, some organizations put a huge pressure on their employees for accurate work and due to this workers commit mistakes due to fear of punishment or penalty charges. Consequently their mental well-being disturb a lot which causes sometimes serious diseases. moreover, workers wages are also a very big concern because their salary is not up to the mark.
On the other hand, there are also some negative effects of being self-employed. Firstly, a substantial amount of money is required to start a new business. Secondly reliable employees is also a serious concern in this age of fraud and decisiveness. Thirdly, labors requirement are also very high , to fulfill them require extra effort and money. For example some workers are needy and they offer for extra bonus. As a result, firm should bear extra expenditures of the employees.
according to my perspective, every single individual has resources to start their own business for living a comfortable life. If they have the ability to bear the negative effects of new business then they must follow this trend .
In conclusion, self-employment give confidence to individuals to leverage their capabilities in an effective way. If people balance its pros and cons then they will get more success for a sustainable life
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for self-employment and the disadvantages. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the reasons for choosing self-employment are stated but not fully explored with depth. The inclusion of a personal opinion in the introduction regarding why self-employment is 'better' is slightly confusing, as the prompt does not ask for an evaluation of which is better, but rather for reasons and disadvantages. The conclusion also introduces this personal stance again, which slightly shifts the focus away from the prompt's requirements. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by more detailed explanation or specific, well-integrated examples.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. There is a logical progression from the reasons for self-employment to the drawbacks. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Thirdly'). Additionally, some transitions between sentences are abrupt, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the link between 'fearful life' and 'mistake' is somewhat disjointed. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that ideas flow more naturally between sentences would enhance the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing or incorrect word choices, such as 'decisiveness' (likely meaning 'indecisiveness' or 'deception') and 'labors requirement'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic descriptors. To improve, you should focus on using more precise collocations and academic vocabulary. For example, instead of 'mental well-being disturb a lot', a more natural expression would be 'mental well-being is significantly compromised'. Expanding your range to include more topic-specific terminology would also be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'workers wages are', 'self-employment give'), missing articles, and awkward sentence construction (e.g., 'if there commit any mistake'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage and capitalization. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring subject-verb agreement will significantly improve the quality of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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