Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.

Why might this be the case?

What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Well in my perspective the most important reason is that people want independence which they think they can never get in a company or organization. Moreover mostly the successful persons we are watching nowadays are self employed. Most common example is Elon musk he started from nothing and after a little bit coding and now he is the most richest and also successful person in the world so the practical examples are also a reason. Moreover in self employment you are dependent on some one. You want permission whether you are I'm emergency you have to describe each and everything to your seniors or someone else but in business you are independent.

If we talk about the disadvantages of the self employment than the first one as I explained is independence to go somewhere by leaving work. Second one and the most important one is that you can never grow up like in your business you can expand it to become more successful but in case of self employment the biggest thing you can achieve is a bonus or a promotion. Consequently in business it totally depends upon you that either you wanna be successful or not, sometimes you have to take risks as Elon musk did in 2008. I'm giving the examples of Elon musk because he is crossing the limits of success so everyone should have an open mindset like him. In 2008 he invested almost all his money in space x and Tesla and now he is even rulling on the space missions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, but the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you identify independence as a key reason for self-employment, the explanation of disadvantages is confusing. For instance, you list 'independence' as a disadvantage, which contradicts your earlier point about it being a benefit. Furthermore, the discussion regarding business growth versus self-employment is unclear, as self-employment is a form of business. The reliance on Elon Musk as the primary example for both sections limits the depth of your argument. To improve, ensure your points are distinct and logically supported with more varied examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hampered by repetitive phrasing and unclear transitions. You use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'Consequently', but they are sometimes used incorrectly, such as when 'Consequently' introduces a point that does not logically follow from the previous sentence. The referencing is also problematic; for example, the phrase 'the first one as I explained' is vague. The progression of ideas is difficult to follow because the arguments often circle back to the same points without advancing the discussion. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You frequently use basic terms like 'successful', 'good', and 'thing'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'rulling on the space missions' (ruling over/dominating) and 'most richest' (a grammatical error that also affects lexical precision). While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'self-employed' and 'promotion', the overall range is insufficient to express complex ideas with precision. To reach a higher band, you should focus on using a wider variety of synonyms and more sophisticated collocations related to business and employment.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'mostly the successful persons we are watching nowadays are self employed', and sentence structure, such as 'you are dependent on some one' (which contradicts your point). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with many run-on sentences and missing commas. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often faulty, leading to confusion. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring correct verb tenses, and refining your use of articles and prepositions.

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