Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.

Why might this be the case?

What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the recent days, an increasing number of individuals prefer becoming business owner instead of to work as employee in any institution or enterprise. This problem can be attributed to several causes. However, this trend creates certain difficulties on individuals and society. Both the causes as well as the demerits will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs with valid factors and appropriate examples.

To begin with, there are numerous reason behind this issue. The primary and most significant factor is lack of freedom and unfair promotion. Workers can face many many challenges at work place. A significant number of organizations are not offering sufficient leaves and increment because of that people can prefer to build own business. To illustrate, according to the research, in India, an growing number of big companies employees develop private business for better position and freedom. Additionally, another contributing reason is that, it provide less finance compared to the work experience and work stability . Therefore, workforce are selecting to create their Self-owned business.

On the other hand, as opposed to the merits there are several demerits that cannot be overlooked. One major drawback is that some time make Independent business are risky because of people do not have require knowledge about the field and a large amount of competitors presents in the recent time. Furthermore, another disadvantage is that it requires higher money for the construction, worker recruitment and building maintenance.

To sum up, there several elements why individuals choose self-employed rather than to work as worker because lack of independence, unequal opportunities for higher promotion and lack of job security, increasing number of the demerits such as requires higher money for the construction and sometime time it risky.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for self-employment and the disadvantages. However, the development of these ideas is limited. The reasons provided, such as 'lack of freedom' and 'unfair promotion', are mentioned but not fully explained or supported with detailed reasoning. The examples, such as the mention of India, are vague and lack depth. The conclusion is repetitive and does not effectively synthesize the main points. To reach a higher band, you need to extend your arguments with more specific explanations and clearer logical links between the causes and the resulting trend.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'To begin with' and 'On the other hand'. Some sentences lack logical flow, making the progression of ideas feel disjointed. For example, the transition between the causes and the disadvantages is abrupt. Additionally, referencing is sometimes unclear, and the concluding paragraph is essentially a list of points already mentioned rather than a cohesive summary. Improving the variety and precision of linking words will significantly enhance the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. There is frequent repetition of basic terms like 'business', 'work', and 'reason'. Some word choices are unnatural or incorrect, such as 'provide less finance' instead of 'offer lower remuneration' or 'construction' when referring to starting a business. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of sophisticated collocations and the reliance on simple, repetitive phrasing limits the score. You should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to employment and entrepreneurship.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'workforce are selecting'), article usage (e.g., 'in the recent days'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'some time make Independent business are risky'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While you attempt complex sentences, they are often marred by errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralization and verb tense consistency.

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