Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.

Why might this be the case?

What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Recently, employment is being a debated issue. So, nowadays people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organization. This essay expresses my opinion towards it.

Working for others can cause different mental and physical problems. For instance, employees have to work hard and sometimes overtime just to complete their task. Additionally, some individuals are also working for their basic livelihood without their interest. People need to work under their seniors which many people find difficult. Some workers are not even getting paid enough for their work. People also fear getting unemployed at any time as their jobs are not secured. A small mistake can create a huge problem for workers and could face hand to mouth problem.

Many people are getting influenced by young entrepreneurs. They can work according to their field of interest. They can meet people with similar interests and establish their own brand that might be beneficial for them as well as country's economy. However, there is high chances of being unsuccessful as there is high competition in the market. Individuals can suffer from different mental and financial problems. For example, a newly started business owner takes loan from bank in hope of paying it back as the business gets well established but unfortunately the business faced downfall. It not only creates financial problem but also mental problems such as stress, anxiety, depression, and furthermore.

In conclusion, government can help new commers for their business by providing a platform or creating new policy for bank loan with lower interest. And also government can regulate new laws for corporate workers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response partially addresses the prompt by outlining some reasons for choosing self-employment, such as working according to personal interests and avoiding corporate pressures, as well as disadvantages like market competition and financial risk. However, the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the discussion on why people leave traditional employment lists several grievances, such as the fear of unemployment and low pay, but fails to extend or fully explain them with concrete examples. Similarly, the conclusion introduces a new idea regarding government intervention that was not previously discussed in the body paragraphs, which weakens the overall development of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays some organizational structure with distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs addressing the prompt's two main questions, and a brief conclusion. However, there is a lack of clear overall progression, and the logical links between ideas can be mechanical or abrupt. Cohesive devices are sometimes used inaccurately or repetitively, such as the frequent reliance on 'also' and 'for example' without smooth transitions. Referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in the second paragraph where pronouns and subject shifts make it difficult to follow the exact progression of thought between employee hardships and entrepreneurship.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate for discussing the topic of employment and self-employment. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'entrepreneurs,' 'financial problem,' and 'unsuccessful,' but noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and collocation appear throughout the text. Examples include 'new commers' instead of newcomers, 'takes loan' instead of takes out a loan, and 'hand to mouth problem' which is awkwardly phrased. These errors sometimes cause minor difficulty or hesitation for the reader, though the overall meaning remains decipherable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response employs a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic compound forms. Attempts at complex sentences are often faulty, featuring frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can cause difficulty for the reader. Issues include awkward verb forms and tenses, such as 'employment is being a debated issue' and 'some individuals are also working... without their interest,' as well as missing articles and prepositions inside grammatical patterns, like 'in hope of paying it back as the business gets well established.' Punctuation errors also detract from the overall clarity of the writing.

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