Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.

Why might this be the case?

What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowdays many can choose to be self-employed as compared to the work in company therefore people can start thier own business from the small investment to fulfil our need and support their family. I think the own business is well now days because the jobs have no good salary and also work oin company is very tough and hard. In pakistan they were many jobs but people can not submit their application to join the jobs as compared to people choose their own business. In Pakistan the private company can not gave the good salary also have a taxes to much so the people can not fulfil yhr basic requirement of life. People can start up from small business and also marketing in the differnet shops because own business having to much profit and ait is also good support their family and fulfil their wishes.

In Pakistan the people have less knowledge about bussiness so they can start their bussiness with high amount so it is one of the main reason to flop the bussniess therefore they have less experience and know how marketing is work. In pakistan most of people

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address both questions to some extent: you suggest that people choose self-employment because company jobs may pay poorly and starting a small business can support a family, then mention limited business knowledge and experience as disadvantages. However, the response is incomplete and the disadvantages are not fully explained; the final sentence stops at “In pakistan most of people”. The reasons are also broad, with no specific example or clear explanation of how self-employment can create difficulties such as unstable income or personal financial risk. The response contains 191 words, so it does not meet the 250-word minimum. Develop each part of the question with a clear explanation and a relevant example, and finish with a complete conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to separate the reasons for self-employment from its disadvantages: the second paragraph begins with “In Pakistan the people have less knowledge about bussiness”. This gives the reader some sense of a change in focus. However, the first paragraph combines several points—salary, job availability, taxes, marketing and family support—without a clear sequence, and the second paragraph is unfinished. Connections between ideas are often unclear, as in “therefore people can start their own business” after the opening comparison. Use one paragraph for each question, organise each around a main point, and connect explanations with clear links such as “As a result” or “For example”.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “self-employed”, “small investment”, “private company”, “marketing” and “experience”, so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is basic and several expressions are repeated or imprecise, such as “own business” and “good salary”. Spelling errors—including “Nowdays”, “thier”, “differnet” and “bussniess”—also make the writing less clear and reduce control of vocabulary. Some word combinations are unnatural, for example “a taxes to much” and “business having to much profit”. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing employment and risk, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to link ideas in longer sentences using words such as “because”, “therefore” and “so”, but most sentence patterns are simple or joined in ways that are difficult to follow. Errors in verb forms and sentence construction appear throughout, for example “the private company can not gave the good salary” and “people can not submit their application to join the jobs”. Articles, agreement and plural forms are also inconsistent, as in “the own business” and “most of people”. These problems sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with one clear subordinate clause; check subject–verb agreement, articles and verb forms when editing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.