Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.
Why might this be the case?
What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays, entrepreneurships and start-ups are well recieved by the society. Many people choose to be self- employed, instead of working for a company or organisation. This essay will discuss the disadvantages of being self employed such as absence of stable job and risk involved.
To begin with, self employment makes people feel anxious as they are lacking a stable job where salary and allowances are ensured. Financial security provided by regular jobs is of paramount importance for common people. For instance, a 9 to 5 corporate job can assure a fixed salary and allowance which is ideal for middle class people. Therefore, self employment will make people lack the security and peace of a conventional jobs.
Furthermore, self employment often involve high amount of risk compared to the conventional works. Every decision is made by the individual alone which is a significant responsibility and foster people to be under high level of stress. As as result, some even lack sleep and loses their health. To elucidate, people initiate start-up businesses may often have to deal with the risk of financial loses. Thus, risk involved when individual choose to be self employed is substanitially high on comparison.
In conclusion, although self employment is a great career choice it has drawbacks such as lack of a secured job and high risks involved.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response identifies two relevant disadvantages—financial insecurity and the risks and stress of running a business—and supports them with examples such as a regular salary and start-up losses. However, the task asks both why people choose self-employment and what its disadvantages are. The essay does not explain the reasons for choosing it, so a major part of the prompt is unanswered; the opening only announces that disadvantages will be discussed. The conclusion repeats the drawbacks rather than completing a balanced response to both questions. The response is also below the required 250 words. To improve, explain plausible attractions, such as independence or flexible working, then develop each side with specific examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “To begin with” and “Furthermore,” and a conclusion. This makes the main focus on disadvantages easy to follow. However, progression is limited because both body paragraphs address only drawbacks, leaving the first question without a place in the argument. Some linking is mechanical, with “Therefore,” “Thus,” and “To elucidate” introducing points without always adding a clear logical step. The conclusion largely repeats the introduction and body points. A clearer plan would give one paragraph to reasons for choosing self-employment and another to disadvantages, using links that show cause, contrast, or consequence precisely.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The response uses some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “financial security,” “regular jobs,” “responsibility,” and “risk,” and attempts more formal expressions such as “of paramount importance.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or awkward: “entrepreneurships,” “high amount of risk,” “conventional works,” and “on comparison” do not sound natural in context. Spelling errors such as “recieved,” “loses” where “losses” is intended, and “substanitially” also reduce accuracy. The meaning is generally recoverable, but the range is not yet consistently controlled. Build a bank of natural phrases for this topic, and check spelling and word forms during proofreading.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
There is some variety in sentence forms, including subordinate clauses such as “as they are lacking a stable job” and a concession in the conclusion beginning “although.” Most sentences communicate the intended point, but errors recur in agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “self employment often involve” should use a singular verb, while “a conventional jobs” has an article–number mismatch. In “people initiate start-up businesses may often have to deal,” the clause structure is faulty, and “some even lack sleep and loses their health” has inconsistent agreement. Review subject–verb agreement, singular and plural forms, and how clauses are joined; then proofread each sentence for these patterns.
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