Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation.

Why might this be the case?

What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

in this century, most people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. There are reasons why many choose to be independent employed are laying off staffs without a prior notice, low income, no promotion, toxicity at work, lack of incentives and other benefit.

on the other hand, most people believed that working independently, enables them make time for themselves, their family, friends, children, and event like picnic, wedding, birthday homewarming and so on. Because working in private sector or public are always exausting. i remembered vividly when i was serving my father's land, the company i worked with runs three shifts in a day, eight hours per each shift throughout the shift you have to be on your feets. So I'm on morning shift, our resumption time is 6:00 am, in order to beat traffic, i have to wake up as early as 4:30am to do my house chores then bath and get dress for work. for instance, if one is working for organization, if you get work late, you will be query of lateness but when you're self employed, you cut the shot that's you can decide open and close business at times, no one will query you.

in conclusion, the disadvantages of self employed

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify several possible reasons for choosing self-employment, including low income, lack of promotion, workplace toxicity, and the desire for more time with family. The personal account of early starts and shift work gives one relevant example. However, the response addresses the disadvantages only indirectly: it describes problems of company employment, then ends with the unfinished phrase “in conclusion, the disadvantages of self employed.” This leaves the second question unanswered and the overall response incomplete. The essay also contains 198 words, below the required 250; 15 words copied from the task prompt were excluded from that count. To develop the response, explain specific disadvantages of self-employment, such as unstable income, lack of paid leave, or responsibility for business costs, and support these with examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response into an opening, a paragraph beginning “on the other hand,” and a conclusion. The example about the writer’s work schedule also gives some detail to the discussion. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the opening lists reasons without explaining their relationship to self-employment, while “on the other hand” introduces another reason rather than a clear contrast. The final paragraph is only a fragment, so the response has no completed conclusion. Some sentences run together, making links between ideas unclear. Use separate paragraphs for reasons and disadvantages, connect each point explicitly, and finish with a conclusion that summarises both parts of the answer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “self-employed,” “incentives,” “organization,” and “traffic,” and the personal example includes concrete details. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to interpret. For example, “independent employed” is not a natural expression, “laying off staffs” uses an unsuitable plural form, and “cut the shot” does not clearly express the intended idea. “Exausting” is also misspelled. Aim for precise, natural collocations and check spelling and word forms. More accurate terms such as “job insecurity,” “flexible working hours,” and “business expenses” would help you explain the topic clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if one is working for organization,” and the account of your workday shows an effort to narrate events. However, the longer sentences are often faulty or run together, and frequent errors can make the reader work to understand the meaning. Examples include “many choose to be independent employed are,” “enables them make time,” and “you will be query of lateness.” There are also problems with articles, agreement, verb forms, and punctuation, as in “the company i worked with runs three shifts.” Practise building accurate sentences first, then combine them with conjunctions and punctuation; check subject–verb agreement and verb patterns such as “enable someone to do something.”

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