Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-07-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Ashdown museum, total number of visitors before the year was 74,000.and During the year after refurbishment it will improve to compare the before refurbishment 92000.it was 18000 visitors has came. year before refurbishment was people have so much dissatisfied compared to the year after refurbishment it will reduce the 40percentage to 15percent.satisfied persons 30percent to 40percentage it will improve compare to 10% will be improved.no response was still the same before and after the year.very dissatisfied was less compared to before year it will reduce 5percent.very satisfied persons has improved the after the year it will 20 percentage will be improved.the yearly that will be improve because of any modifications the museum or promoting the satisfaction percentage will increase automatically the visitors also highly come so many persons see the satisfaction percentage and they will came to the museum.it was the compared of year before and year after the refurbishment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the task by identifying the main features, such as the increase in visitor numbers and the shifts in satisfaction levels. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks a clear structure. While you mention the rise from 74,000 to 92,000 visitors and the decrease in dissatisfaction, the report reads more like a list of statistics rather than a cohesive summary. To improve, ensure you group related data points together and provide a clear overview or 'summary' paragraph that highlights the most significant trends before diving into the specific details. Avoid including personal opinions or speculative explanations about why satisfaction increased, as this is a data-reporting task, not an argumentative essay.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response lacks paragraphing, which makes it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of information. The sentences are often linked in a mechanical or repetitive way, such as starting multiple sentences with 'it will'. There is a lack of cohesive devices to connect ideas smoothly. To achieve a higher band, you should organize your report into clear paragraphs: an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and two body paragraphs detailing the specific data. Use transition words like 'in contrast', 'furthermore', or 'consequently' to help the reader navigate your analysis more effectively.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic verbs like 'improve' and 'increase' without much variation. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'satisfied persons' instead of 'satisfied visitors' and 'highly come' which is not standard English. To improve, try to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'rose significantly', 'declined', 'remained stable', or 'a marked improvement'. Focusing on more precise terminology for data reporting will help you convey your points more professionally.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. For example, '18000 visitors has came' should be '18,000 visitors came', and 'it will reduce the 40percentage' is grammatically incorrect. Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, which hinders clarity. You rely heavily on simple sentence structures. To improve, practice using a mix of simple and complex sentences, and pay closer attention to basic grammar rules like tense usage and pluralization. Proofreading your work for these common errors would significantly improve the readability of your writing.
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