Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given table illustrates the total number of visitors who visit to Ashdown Museum. Moreover, the pie charts below gives information about results of analysis of visitors satisfaction who satisfied before refurbishment and after refurbishment in a particular year.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that total number of visitors who visiting before refurbishment was stood with low amount to compare with who visit the museum after refurbishment. Furthermore, the proportion of very satisfied and satisfied people was presented with low percentage when the museum was not re-developed while it increase with pleasure proportion after refurbishment.

The total number of visitors to Ashdown Museum, was represented with low amount with 74,000 when the museum was not developed while it amount increase by 18,000 and reach 92,000 after re-developing the museum. The proportion of very satisfied individuals was stood with just 15% before refurbishment whereas, it increase significantly by 20% and reach 35% over the period. In addition to, the proportion of very dissatisfied people recorded with 10% before re-development while it decrease by 5%.

The satisfied citizens was stood with 30% before refurbishment while it increase after re-develop the museum by 10% and reach 40%. Moreover, the notable portion is that dissatisfied humankind was recorded with the highest proportion of year before refurbishment whereas, it dramatically decrease after refurbishment by 25% and reach 15%. This is an extremally positive aspect. The dissatisfied humans were relatively similar before and after refurbishment with just 5%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends in visitor numbers and satisfaction levels. You successfully highlighted the increase in total visitors and the shift toward higher satisfaction post-refurbishment. However, the analysis is slightly hampered by inaccurate reporting of data. For example, you state that dissatisfied visitors decreased by 25% (from 15% to 10% is a 5% point drop, not 25%). Additionally, the final sentence regarding 'dissatisfied humans' is confusing and contradicts the data provided in the charts. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are calculated and reported with greater precision and that comparisons are logically consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'In addition to' to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the internal structure of the sentences occasionally lacks flow, making the text feel a bit disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that referencing (e.g., 'this', 'these') is used more effectively to connect sentences within paragraphs.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'refurbishment', 'proportion', and 'significantly'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choices and unnatural collocations, such as 'dissatisfied humankind', 'pleasure proportion', and 'stood with low amount'. These errors occasionally impede the natural flow of the text. To improve, focus on learning common collocations used in data reporting, such as 'a significant increase' or 'the proportion stood at'. Avoid using overly informal or imprecise terms like 'humankind' or 'citizens' when referring to museum visitors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tenses and subject-verb agreement, such as 'total number of visitors who visiting' (should be 'who visited') and 'it increase' (should be 'it increased'). Additionally, there are issues with preposition usage and article placement. While these errors do not completely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall quality of the writing. Focusing on basic tense consistency and subject-verb agreement will help improve your score significantly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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