Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given drawing illustrates about the growing rate of individuals during the year before and after refurbishment. In addition the total number of visitors to Ashdown Museum surveys the result of satisfied during the same two periods.
Upon initial observation, a comprehensive analysis of the data reveals a striking divergence in trends between the monitored subject over the given period. While the primary metric corrosponding satisfied ration is 30 percentage before refurbishment experienced a pronounced and significant shift, the figure associated with satisfied ratio is 40 percentage after refurbishment displayed a remarkable steady trajectory, remaining comparatively stable throughout the entire time frame.
Therefore, upon closer examination of the statistical distribution, it becomes immediately apparent that the proportion attributed to 40 percentage dissatisfied before refurbishment vastly over shadowed the corrosponding metric for corrosponding metric for 15 percentage dissatisfied before refurbishment by substantial margin. More specifically, the former registered at an impressive during refurbishment, Whereas the latter resting at a modest after refurbishment, respectively
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to accurately report the data provided in the prompt. While it mentions the two periods (before and after refurbishment), the description of the visitor numbers and satisfaction levels is confusing and factually disconnected from the visual data. The student uses vague phrases like 'striking divergence' and 'remarkable steady trajectory' without clearly summarizing the actual trends (e.g., the increase in visitor numbers or the shift in satisfaction ratings). The response lacks a clear overview and fails to make meaningful comparisons between the two years, resulting in a failure to address the core requirements of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is severely hampered by unclear referencing and disjointed sentences. Cohesive devices such as 'Therefore' and 'More specifically' are used, but they do not connect ideas logically because the underlying information is incoherent. The repetition of phrases like 'corrosponding metric for' indicates a lack of control over cohesive structures. The overall arrangement is mechanical and fails to guide the reader through the data effectively.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is often misused, leading to a lack of clarity. Phrases like 'corrosponding satisfied ration' and 'vastly over shadowed' demonstrate an attempt to use academic language, but the collocations are incorrect. There is significant repetition of terms, and the student struggles to use precise vocabulary to describe statistical trends. The errors in word choice are frequent and often impede the reader's understanding of the intended meaning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that distort meaning. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'the figure... displayed' (which is grammatically acceptable) contrasted with 'the total number of visitors... surveys the result', which is nonsensical. Sentence structures are often fragmented or poorly constructed, such as 'the former registered at an impressive during refurbishment'. Punctuation is also inconsistent. The range of structures is limited, and the high frequency of errors makes the text difficult to follow.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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