Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The pie chart depicts the information about the visits of public to museum.Its showing the people reviews about theie visits to museum which they have made before renovation of museum and after renovation of museum.
Renovation gives good impact to a building and enhance tourist attraction and make their visits satisfactory.Similar effects are visible as the number of satisfied and more satisfied people has increased after restoration of museum.Renovation of museum also minimize the dissatisfied
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, stopping abruptly at only 75 words. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed. While the student attempts to describe the general trends shown in the charts, such as the increase in satisfied visitors and the decrease in dissatisfaction after the renovation, key data points from the table (such as the total visitor numbers rising from 74,000 to 92,000) are omitted entirely. The overview is severely underdeveloped, and the text trails off incomplete at the end. To achieve a higher band, the writer must ensure the response is sufficiently long and covers all visual elements by selecting, reporting, and comparing the main features.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The text suffers significantly from a lack of proper paragraphing and organization, largely because it is an incomplete fragment of only 75 words. Although the sentences follow a basic logical sequence starting with an introduction and moving to survey results, cohesive devices are minimal and mechanical. Phrases like 'Similar effects are visible' attempt to connect ideas, but the overall structure is disjointed. Furthermore, the response ends abruptly mid-sentence, preventing any sense of logical progression or cohesive flow across a full essay structure. Future writing needs to be structured into clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs with a wider variety of cohesive ties.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent awkward phrasing and word choices. For instance, the student writes 'the visits of public to museum' instead of 'public visits to the museum' or 'visitor numbers', and 'people reviews about theie visits' contains spelling and grammatical errors ('theie' instead of 'their'). While words like 'renovation', 'satisfactory', and 'tourist attraction' appear, the range is far too limited to discuss the visual data with precision. Collocations are occasionally unnatural, such as 'Renovation gives good impact to a building'. To improve, the student should expand their lexicon of reporting verbs and descriptive adjectives suitable for Academic Task 1.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The grammatical structure is extremely limited, consisting mostly of simple and flawed complex sentences. There are several noticeable errors throughout the text, including missing articles ('visits of public to museum', 'after renovation of museum'), incorrect verb forms ('Its showing'), and spelling mistakes. The final sentence is incomplete ('Renovation of museum also minimize the dissatisfied'), which breaks off before completion. While simple sentences are generally understandable, the lack of a wide range of complex structures and the persistence of basic grammatical errors restricts the score to this band.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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