Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The table illustrates the amount of visitors to Ashdown Museum one year before and after the refurbishment. While the charts show the result of surveys of their visites.

Overall, More people visited the Museum after the refurbishment. Whereas, the surveys show majority of people very satisfied with the refurbishment compared to previous year and also dissatisfaction had been increased.

While 74000 people visited the year before refurbishment , but 18,000 more people visited after enhancement of museum. An year before upgradation of museum, while propotion of 40% of people were dissatisfied , but after refurbishment it reduced to 15%. And 30% people accounted to statisfied before enhancement which comverted to 40% after ungradation.

Previouly, the propostion of very satisfied people were only at 15% which dramatically surged after refurbishment around to 35%. the no responce rate of people remained constant to 5% before and after refurbishment, And the very disssatisfied rate reduced to half after refurbishment.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You cover the main features of both the visitor total and the satisfaction surveys, and your overview correctly identifies that attendance rose after refurbishment. You also report several key figures accurately: visitors increased from 74,000, dissatisfaction fell from 40% to 15%, satisfaction rose from 30% to 40%, and very satisfied responses climbed from 15% to 35%. The unchanged 5% no-response figure and the halving of very dissatisfied responses are also included. However, the overview says that “dissatisfaction had been increased,” which contradicts the data and your later account. Make the overall trends precise and distinguish dissatisfaction from the “very dissatisfied” category. This would make an otherwise well-supported summary clearer and more consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs giving comparisons and figures. This helps the reader locate the main information. However, progression within sentences and between ideas is often unclear because linking words are used inaccurately or repeatedly. For example, “While 74000 people visited …, but 18,000 more people visited” combines two contrasting linkers, while “Whereas” begins a sentence without completing the contrast. The final paragraph also strings together separate points with commas and a capitalised “And.” Use one clear linker at a time, group related survey results together, and make each sentence express a complete comparison. These changes would improve the flow and reduce the impression of mechanical or faulty cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “refurbishment,” “dissatisfied,” “satisfied,” and “remained constant,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning harder to follow. Examples include “amount of visitors” for a countable group, “visites,” “propotion,” and “statisified”; there are also repeated, awkward alternatives such as “enhancement,” “upgradation,” and “ungradation” for refurbishment. Prefer accurate, consistent terms such as “number of visitors,” “survey responses,” and “after the refurbishment.” Careful spelling and more natural collocations would make your comparisons clearer and more precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including contrasts introduced by “While” and “Whereas,” but these structures are often not controlled successfully. For instance, “While 74000 people visited …, but 18,000 more people visited” uses incompatible conjunctions, and “Whereas, the surveys show…” is an incomplete dependent clause. There are also errors in articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “An year before…” and the comma splice in “the no responce rate … remained constant …, And the very disssatisfied rate…”. These recurring problems can make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Build accuracy with complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check agreement, articles, and punctuation.

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