Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Introduction:
The provided table illustrates fluctuations in Ashdown Museum through out before refurbishment-after refurbishment concentrating on very satisfied,satisfied,dissatisfied,very dissatisfied and no response it is structured to display how the data evolved chronologically.
Overview:
Broadly speaking,the year before refurbishment followed a distinct downward trajectory where as year after refurbishment headed in the reverce direction yhe most striking pattern is that while emission the year before referbishment dropped significiently over time,the year after refurbishment experienced steady increases converging near same lavel by ashdown museum.
Body detal:
In specific term,the year before refurbishment commenced at 30% in year before refurbishment and rised to 35% by year after refurbishment,while the satisfied ratio 30% at before refurbishment and thant it was sharply rised 40%.but on the otherhand the all the responces were miner changes the majers changes of the to responces and no responce ratio were remained stable at both catagouries.
Conclusions:
While means,the satisfied & very satis fied ratio were rises at the year after refurbishment While all the other responces were just miner changes and no responce were same at the both time.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You identify the two periods and include several relevant figures, such as visitor satisfaction rising from 30% to 40% and very satisfied responses increasing from 15% to 35%. However, the overview is not grounded in the chart: it describes a downward trajectory and later increases “converging near same level,” although the data are satisfaction categories, not changes over time within each year. The claim that other responses showed only minor changes also overlooks the substantial falls in dissatisfied responses (40% to 15%) and very dissatisfied responses (10% to 5%). The visitor totals, 74,000 and 92,000, are not reported. Select the main contrasts accurately and summarise them clearly.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has separate introduction, overview, body and conclusion sections, so there is an attempt to organise the information. Some comparisons are also grouped together, particularly the two positive satisfaction categories. However, progression is difficult to follow because the overview refers to an unclear “downward trajectory” and the body moves between categories without a clear comparison of before and after. Linking expressions such as “while,” “on the other hand” and “but” are repeated or used where the relationship between ideas is unclear. The conclusion largely repeats the body rather than adding a concise summary. Organise the body into positive and negative responses, and use clear comparisons to guide the reader.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You attempt a range of task-related vocabulary, including “trajectory,” “satisfaction,” “ratio” and “converging,” and use labels such as “very satisfied” and “dissatisfied” that are relevant to the charts. However, vocabulary is often inaccurate, repetitive or difficult to understand. Phrases such as “fluctuations in Ashdown Museum” and “the all the responces were miner changes” do not express the intended information clearly; “ratio” is also less suitable than “percentage” here. Frequent spelling errors, including “reverce,” “significiently” and “catagouries,” further strain the reader. Use precise chart language and check spelling carefully; for example, describe visitor numbers as rising and satisfaction percentages as increasing or decreasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
There are attempts to form longer sentences and make comparisons, for example, “while the satisfied ratio 30% at before refurbishment and thant it was sharply rised 40%.” However, sentence structures are very limited in control, and frequent errors make relationships between ideas hard to follow. Verb forms are often incorrect (“rised,” “were rises”), articles and prepositions are missing or misplaced, and clauses are joined without reliable punctuation. The opening sentence also lacks a clear grammatical structure. Practise writing short, accurate comparison sentences first, such as “The proportion who were satisfied rose from 30% before refurbishment to 40% afterwards,” then combine ideas using correctly formed clauses.
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