Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, many medical research projects are funded by private companies. In your opinion, do you think that research should be carried by private companies, individuals or government?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's rapidly changing world there are various masses who believe that many medical research are mostly funded by the private organisation. while, other say that individuals or government should take this responsibility. I believe that both private companies and government should take equal responsiblity and work togather. This essay will highlight the importance of private organisation and government in medical projects in following paragraph.

First and foremost, Private pharmaceutical compines should be more encourageed to take part in research because they have inuff funding and moder technology with the help of which they could work in a more effective and efficient manner. Moreover, due to competition between organisation motivate them to produce high quality of medicines in less time. For instance, during Covid-19, various parmaceutical companies play a vital role in production of vaccines which helped million of people worldwild.

On the other hand, government involvement is also equally important because there main object should be to provided batter lifestyle rather then profit making unlike some individual organisations whoes ultimate motive is only profit making and ignoring social effect of poor medication. However, government-funded research can ensure that facilities and new development are accessible by gerneral public and does not have any ill-effect in the srounding. To illustrate. higher authories of India are providing various medical treatment at very cheaper rate to help financially weaker families.

To conclude, I believe that private organisations and individuals are proforming great in parmaceutical Industries. So, government participation is also really important in this field to check that they are performing their duties in correct manner or not. In contraste, a combination of private investment and government supervision would be best way to improve heathcare and benefit society.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you support a partnership between private companies and government, and both body paragraphs give relevant reasons. The discussion of companies’ funding, technology and competition is supported by the vaccine example, while the government paragraph explains public access and the need to protect people from profit-driven decisions. This addresses the task, but the two sides are not developed equally: the private-sector benefits are explained more clearly, whereas the claim about government oversight and “ill-effect” is broad and would benefit from a specific explanation of how regulation improves safety or access. The conclusion also briefly mentions individuals, although your main argument focuses on companies and government. Develop that distinction and make the examples more precise to strengthen the response further.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for private companies and government, and a conclusion. The progression from the benefits of company research to the public role of government is easy to follow, and signposts such as “First and foremost,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” help guide the reader. This shows the coherent organisation expected at this level and some effective paragraphing. However, several transitions feel formulaic, and the opening sentence’s contrast is awkwardly punctuated, which interrupts the flow. Some references are also unclear, such as “they” in the final paragraph, which could refer to companies or individuals. Use a wider range of linking methods and make pronoun references explicit to create smoother cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “pharmaceutical companies,” “competition,” “government-funded research,” “accessible,” and “financially weaker families.” These choices help communicate the main ideas and show attempts to use language suited to medical research and public policy. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “compines,” “parmaceutical,” “worldwild,” and “heathcare.” Some collocations and expressions are also imprecise: “various masses” is not natural for describing people, and “more encourageed to take part” does not express the intended idea accurately. These slips sometimes make the reader pause, even though the overall meaning remains understandable. Focus on accurate spelling and natural collocations, and choose precise terms rather than relying on broad or awkward phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including reason clauses with “because,” a relative clause in “with the help of which,” and a contrast introduced by “unlike.” Most ideas can be understood, and the response is organised into complete sentences. Some grammatical errors remain, however. For example, “many medical research are” has a number-agreement problem, “due to competition between organisation motivate them” lacks a clear grammatical subject, and “government-funded research can ensure that facilities … is accessible” would require agreement with the plural subject. There are also issues with articles, verb forms and punctuation, such as the sentence fragment “To illustrate.” Review agreement and sentence boundaries, and check each clause for a clear subject and correctly formed verb. This will make your varied structures more reliable.

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