Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, many medical research projects are funded by private companies. In your opinion, do you think that research should be carried by private companies, individuals or government?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Usually these days, several research programs related to medical are sponsored by private industries, due to which many issues are seen. I strongly believe that private companies should be stopped involving in such projects to correct the problem areas like pricing, financial benefits over social betterment and less attention to prevention and side effects.

The major problem that incurs by the private companies for such research is the prices of the products manufactured. Mostly it is seen in the market that prices of the medicines rise up with the demand. For example during the time of covid, cost of vaccination was touching the sky. The medicine was stocked to sell on the higher prices. Similarly, during the rainy season rate of dengue and malaria medicines used to go up.

The other drawback of these companies, is the financial benefit. Although, these companies have excessive funds still they prefer cheaper alternates to earn more profits. They use cheaper ingredients, cut cost for quantity over quality. Due to which effectiveness of medicines and vaccines is not very high. For instance, the tablets of panadol or paracetamol, one at a time was enough in older days. But now due to the high end business benefits one tablet is not helping to cure the problem. Doctors are recommending more than one medicine at a time to improve its productivity. These companies are not looking to help people instead making situation difficult for their consumers.

Similarly, one other disadvantage that I have observed is their less attention to prevention and side effects. To keep the business flourish, the whole focus is on increasing the problems. They are not spending much time in the prevention of the problem. However, one solution is causing another problem. This is the business strategy to create the problems, later on providing solution to the problem created intentionally at first place. As we observed that covid vaccination is causing heart issues in many people.

In conclusion, I strongly suggest that government entities should involve in such studies, to prevent frauds, pricing issues and other personal benefits over social betterment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that government funding is preferable. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide reasons such as pricing and profit motives, the arguments are often based on generalizations or anecdotal claims (e.g., the claim that paracetamol is less effective now). To reach a higher band, you should provide more balanced or nuanced evidence. The argument regarding 'prevention and side effects' is a bit repetitive and lacks specific, verifiable examples. The position is consistent throughout, but the depth of analysis could be improved by exploring why government funding might be more effective beyond just avoiding 'fraud'.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward. For example, 'The major problem that incurs by the private companies' and 'Similarly, one other disadvantage' are used to transition, but the internal flow within paragraphs could be smoother. Referencing is generally clear, but some sentences feel disconnected from the main point of the paragraph. Improving the variety of linking words would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas, including terms like 'sponsored', 'social betterment', and 'entities'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations, such as 'prices of the medicines rise up' (should be 'increase' or 'soar') and 'incurs by the private companies' (inaccurate usage). Some phrases are repetitive, such as 'problems' and 'solutions', which limits the sophistication of your writing. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding informal phrasing like 'touching the sky'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'private companies should be stopped involving in such projects' (should be 'stopped from involving' or 'should not be involved'), 'prices of the medicines rise up' (subject-verb agreement/phrasal verb issues), and 'one solution is causing another problem'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are minor errors in article usage and prepositional phrases. A greater focus on sentence variety and error correction would help elevate your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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