Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, many medical research projects are funded by private companies. In your opinion, do you think that research should be carried by private companies, individuals or government?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Increasingly, the debate surrounding about the right body to carry out medical research projects has gained significant attention. Although there are different views on this matter, I strongly believe that allowing private companies or individuals to carry out medicine researches to get immediate results is the most pragmatic approach to adopt in modern society.

A primary justification for this view is that it significantly reduces pressure from the government but also values new talent and innovative ideas. Specifically, individuals in private companies can give their ideas and develop new medicines, while government can comfortably focus on other tasks. For instance, many people in India reported massive improvements in cancer treatment after government privatised medical practices.

Admittedly, the issue of a noticeable decline in transparency cannot be ignored. This is primarily because private organisations sometimes choose inappropriate methods ti generate more profits. To illustrate this drawback, in 2011, many people in India died due to a medicine which consisted many harmful substances. Although that medicine seemed to be effective initially, but it had long term consequences. However, provided there is sensible management, this issue can be resolved. Therefore, we should still focus on allowing private companies to conduct medical research projects to get rapid results.

In conclusion, when looking at the issue about the right body to carry out medical researches, the best choice is clear. I firmly maintain that allowing private companies or professionals to conduct medical research programs in order to get results rapidly is the most effective approach. While concerns regarding a noticeable decline in the transparency of researches are valid, the long-term advantages can ultimately outweigh any temporary setbacks.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that favors private sector involvement in medical research. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of reduced government pressure and the potential for innovation. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The example regarding India is a bit vague and lacks sufficient detail to fully support the argument. While the counter-argument regarding transparency is acknowledged, the rebuttal is brief and relies on the vague concept of 'sensible management' rather than concrete solutions. To reach a higher band, the student should provide more nuanced analysis and specific, well-explained examples to substantiate their claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used throughout, such as 'A primary justification', 'Admittedly', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing. For instance, the link between the example of the 2011 incident and the argument for 'sensible management' is a bit abrupt. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the benefits of privatization to the acknowledgment of risks and the final synthesis.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at more sophisticated language like 'pragmatic approach', 'innovative ideas', and 'long-term consequences'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'medicine researches' (research is an uncountable noun) and 'consisted many harmful substances' (should be 'consisted of'). There are also minor errors like 'ti' instead of 'to'. While the range is sufficient to convey the message clearly, the lack of precision in some areas prevents a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'debate surrounding about' (redundant preposition), 'government can comfortably focus' (missing article 'the'), and the awkward construction 'Although that medicine seemed to be effective initially, but it had...'. These errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent the essay from reaching the 7.0 band. The student should focus on subject-verb agreement, article usage, and avoiding redundant prepositions.

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