Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays, many medical research projects are funded by private companies. In your opinion, do you think that research should be carried by private companies, individuals or government?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Nowadays, many private companies had initiate their project on medical research due to they try to earn more funds in their industry. From my perspective, it create detrimental role to research in their own companies such as individuals or government.
To begin with, numerous have to commence to developed more medical becuase today majority of many urban area are making harmful medicines and it also damage the body parts. However, government had taken a benificial rule for all the departments that only regular undergraduate creatificate individuals can make tablets and liquids.Owing to, it will be safe and not make an serious action on it. For instance, In London the company name was " medical store" hence adults can purchase without any option on it. On account of in foreign different types of medicines are been developing day-by-day.
On the other hand, many people argu that in private comapine citizen cannot have to do wrok due to at present many pupils are salling the products in the market and numerous are buying the item. Moreover, many industry today making Mitigate medicine in their private departments. Furthermore, government had had taken this action in the many public are to not take but rather than humans are purchasing the material because it have given more discount. As a result, after few months it will affected Substander on thei persona lifestyle. For Example, in many countries this situation had done done and rose dramatically.
In conclusion, government giving opportuinty that only those people who have their master of certificate they can only make medicine in the comapines. Nevertheless, illigal people have paid more money to make the tablets becuase it time to not take stric action on it. In my opinion, individuals do not have to make dangouse medicine neither try to work in different workplacment nor creating avoid problems.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
You refer to the role of government and private companies, and your conclusion indicates that you favour government control of medicine production. However, the response only minimally addresses the central choice of who should carry out medical research: much of the discussion shifts to who should manufacture or sell medicines, and the position on private companies, individuals, and government is not clearly compared. The examples, such as the London “medical store” and people buying discounted products, are difficult to connect to research or to your main argument. To strengthen the response, state your preferred funder or researcher directly, explain why that option is best, and develop relevant examples showing how it could improve medical research.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” show an attempt to organise the discussion. However, ideas are not arranged coherently within this structure: the first body paragraph moves from harmful medicines to government rules, a London shop, and medicines developed abroad without clear links. The second paragraph similarly shifts between employment, product sales, private departments, and government action. Some connectors, including “Moreover” and “As a result,” do not make the relationship between ideas clear. Build each paragraph around one reason, then explain and support it in a logical sequence; use referencing and linking words only where their relationship is clear.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “medical research,” “departments,” “tablets,” and “discount,” and use some linking expressions to present your points. However, vocabulary is often basic, repetitive, or inaccurate, and several choices make the intended meaning difficult to follow. For example, “beneficial rule,” “Mitigate medicine,” and “Substander on their persona lifestyle” do not express clear or natural meanings in context. Spelling errors such as “comapine,” “becuase,” and “dangouse” also reduce clarity. Aim for precise terms connected to research and regulation, such as “clinical trials,” “research funding,” and “safety standards,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “however,” and “as a result.” Nevertheless, errors in sentence construction and verb forms are frequent, and they sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Examples include “many private companies had initiate,” “it create detrimental role,” and “government had taken a benificial rule”; these show problems with tense, agreement, and sentence formation. The sentence beginning “Owing to” is also incomplete, while “it will affected” combines verb forms incorrectly. Practise forming clear subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses with accurate tense and agreement. Review articles, plurals, and punctuation as part of proofreading.
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