Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, many medical research projects are funded by private companies. In your opinion, do you think that research should be carried by private companies, individuals or government?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent years, several medical research projects are financially equipped by private organizations or individuals. In my opinion, the researches should be carried by the government departments because they can maintain data security strictly and they also have access to vaste range of data from all around the country.

The major reason why high-risk medical research projects should be conducted by government is that they will follow the data security rules strictly and abide by the laws of the country. The government of the country can be accountable for any misuse or leakage of citizens' personal data, whereas some organizations and individuals do not follow the rules and regulations strictly. For example, the government of a country is carrying a medical research on heart patient and decide to gather information by keeping personal details confidential and only use the required data in the reseach. As a result, the research is conducted while securing the data of people of the country.

Another reason the opinion that governments should conduct medical researches is that they will work for the actual progress and helping the citizens of the country. Some private companies are conducting research only for the financial profits in mind, and not for improving the health of people. Meanwhile, the government will carry out research in the aim to improve medical treatments and findind solutions to diseases. For example, during COVID-19, the governments of several countries helped find the solution and vaccinate people with affordable prices. This is why the government authorities are suitable for medical research projects.

In conclusion, governments should carry out the research projects as they will abide by the laws and the government will also work for people without focusing on the financial profits in return.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you argue that governments should conduct medical research, citing data protection and public benefit. Both reasons are relevant, and the examples about confidential patient information and COVID-19 help support them. This meets the task well, but the development is uneven. The data-security point is explained through a hypothetical example, while the claim that governments are accountable for misuse is not fully explored. The COVID-19 example is also broad and does not show specifically how government research differed from private research. To strengthen the response further, explain the mechanisms behind each benefit and acknowledge, even briefly, how private funding might contribute.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay has a clear, effective structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and the conclusion restates your position. The progression from data security to public health aims is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Another reason” and “In conclusion” make the organisation clear. Examples are placed alongside the points they support. Some linking is a little formulaic, however, and repeated references to “the government” and “research” make parts of the essay less smooth. The sentence beginning “Another reason the opinion…” is also awkwardly framed, which briefly interrupts the flow. Use more varied transitions and clearer referencing, while keeping the paragraph structure that already works well.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “data security,” “personal data,” “financial profits,” “medical treatments,” and “vaccinate.” These choices make your main ideas understandable, and you attempt more formal phrasing such as “accountable for any misuse.” However, several inaccurate word forms, spellings, and collocations limit precision: “financially equipped” is not natural for funding, “the researches” is incorrect, and “vast range” is misspelled. Phrases such as “carrying a medical research” and “with affordable prices” are also unnatural. Aim to learn common academic collocations as complete phrases and check spelling and countability. More precise wording would make your argument sound more fluent and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses with “because,” “whereas,” and “while,” and most sentences communicate the intended meaning. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, agreement, and verb forms. For example, “the government … is carrying a medical research … and decide” shifts from singular agreement to a base-form verb; “the government will carry out research in the aim” also has an inaccurate grammatical pattern. The sentence “Another reason the opinion …” lacks a clear structure. These issues do not generally prevent understanding, but they reduce accuracy. Practise checking each sentence’s subject and verb, and use reliable patterns such as “conduct research” and “with the aim of improving.”

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