Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Underground Railway Systems

City	Date opened	Kilometers of route	Passengers per year (in millions)
London	1863	394	775
Paris	1900	199	1191
Tokyo	1927	155	1927
Washington DC	1976	126	144
Kyoto	1981	11	45
Los Angeles	2001	28	50

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The table shows the imformation about 6 countries make undergound railway systems .

overall, the table represents the six countrys data in different years . while , also represents the data about the many countries . govermnet can appdate the underground railway system in many countrys .

To commence, in tokyo passengers per year value was increase on the behafe of other countrys . the lowest kilometers of route in kyoto in 1981. but , the london get maximum value is [redacted phone] in 1863 . goverment can take attention on underground railway systems in other countrys update in 1863 then, fixed in 2001 in los angeles.

on the other hands, the systems in washington DC, Kyoto,and Los Angeles were established much more recently - in 1976 , 1981, and 2001 , respectively . these three cities features considerably smaller network and lower passenger volumes . washington DC has a route length of 126 kilometers and serves 144million passengers per year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several relevant features, including Tokyo’s high passenger figure, Kyoto’s short route, and the more recent opening dates of Washington DC, Kyoto, and Los Angeles. However, the overview is unclear and does not accurately summarise the main comparisons: London has the longest route and is the oldest system, while Tokyo carries the most passengers. The statement that London’s “maximum value is 394-775” confuses route length with passenger numbers, and the claim that governments should update systems is not supported by the table. Several figures and comparisons are omitted, including Paris’s passenger total and Los Angeles’s route length. Focus on reporting the data accurately and selecting the most important contrasts.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has an opening, an attempted overview, and two body paragraphs, so there is some paragraph-level organisation. The final paragraph also groups the three newer systems together, which is a useful comparison. However, the progression is difficult to follow because ideas are repeated or placed together without a clear relationship. For example, the overview repeats that the table shows data for six places, while “on the other hands” introduces a comparison that is not clearly connected to the preceding paragraph. Linking words such as “but” and “then” do not consistently show the intended relationships. Organise the response around clear comparisons—perhaps older versus newer systems, then route length and passenger numbers—and use transitions only where they clarify those links.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “route length,” “passengers per year,” “established,” and “network,” and these terms help communicate the subject. However, the range is basic and several word choices or spellings make the meaning unclear. “Countries” is inaccurate for the places listed, which are cities, and “the table represents” is repeated without adding information. Phrases such as “on the behafe of other countrys” and “take attention” are not natural in this context. Frequent spelling errors, including “imformation,” “undergound,” and “goverment,” also reduce clarity. Build a small set of accurate chart-description phrases and check spelling, especially for key nouns and comparative language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There are attempts to form longer sentences and use clauses, as in “while, also represents the data about the many countries,” but sentence structures are often incomplete or difficult to interpret. The opening lacks a clear grammatical construction, and “the london get maximum value” has problems with the verb form and sentence structure. Articles, capitalization, and punctuation are also inconsistent, as seen in “in tokyo” and the spaces around commas and full stops. Some simple statements, such as “Washington DC has a route length of 126 kilometers,” are more understandable, but the response does not yet show reliable control across sentence types. Practise complete subject–verb sentences and use straightforward comparative structures before attempting longer clauses.

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