Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Underground Railway Systems

City	Date opened	Kilometers of route	Passengers per year (in millions)
London	1863	394	775
Paris	1900	199	1191
Tokyo	1927	155	1927
Washington DC	1976	126	144
Kyoto	1981	11	45
Los Angeles	2001	28	50

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The table provides data about the underground railways systems in six cities which is london paris tokyo washington dc kyoto los angeles .

overall , it is crystal clear that , the highest value of passengers per year in tokyo whereas the lowest value is kyoto .

To commence with, in the city london the railway system is opened in 1863 and it is of 394 kilometre of route and the value of passengers per year in millions is 775 , which is highest ,

movingahead, in paris the value of passengers per year in millions is 1191 . moreover, in the city tokyo the number of passengers per year in millions is 1927 . which is minimum

on the other hand , in the city washington DC , the number of passengers per year in millions is 144 which is smallest . whereas, in kyoto the value of passengers in millions is 45 which is the smallest value in all the values . the number of passengers in millions is 50 which is minimum

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the table’s subject and attempt an overview by comparing passenger totals, but the main features are not reported accurately or consistently. Tokyo has the highest annual passenger figure, while Kyoto has the lowest; however, you also call Tokyo’s figure “minimum” and describe London’s 775 million as “highest,” which conflicts with the data. The response gives little information about opening dates or route lengths beyond London, despite these being key columns. It also mislabels Washington’s 144 million as the smallest, although Kyoto’s 45 million is lower. To improve, select the clearest overall patterns, then accurately compare all six cities across the three measures rather than repeating or contradicting individual figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, beginning with an introduction and overview before moving through city details. Connectors such as “To commence with,” “moreover,” and “on the other hand” show an effort to link ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the comparisons are not grouped by a clear feature, and several statements contradict one another. For example, Tokyo is first presented as having the highest passenger total, then called “minimum”; the final sentences also repeat that Kyoto and Los Angeles have low figures without clearly distinguishing them. Use separate paragraphs for an overview and grouped comparisons, and make each linking phrase express a genuine contrast or addition.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant vocabulary for describing a table, including “passengers per year,” “route,” “highest,” and “lowest.” This gives the reader a basic sense of the subject, but the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise. “The value of passengers per year in millions” is repeated where a concise expression such as “annual passenger numbers” would be clearer. “Railways systems” is an awkward combination, and “movingahead” is incorrectly joined and unsuitable as a formal transition. Aim for accurate, varied terms such as “network length,” “opened,” and “recorded,” while checking spelling, spacing, and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer clauses, but control is uneven, and errors often make relationships between figures unclear. The opening sentence lacks appropriate capitalisation and punctuation, while “the highest value of passengers per year in Tokyo” is not a complete, well-formed comparison. In “the railway system is opened in 1863,” the verb form is incorrect for a past event; use “opened.” Several clauses are joined with commas or full stops inappropriately, as in “1927. which is minimum,” and articles and sentence boundaries are inconsistent. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past tense for opening dates and accurate punctuation between clauses.

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