Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Underground Railway Systems
City Date opened Kilometers of route Passengers per year (in millions) London 1863 394 775 Paris 1900 199 1191 Tokyo 1927 155 1927 Washington DC 1976 126 144 Kyoto 1981 11 45 Los Angeles 2001 28 50
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given table illustrates the data about the percentage of underground rail way station in six cities ( Landon, Paris , Tokyo, washin gton DC, Kyoto, and los angele,) from 1863 to 2001
Looking for an overall perspective, it is evident that the number of passengers who travelled from many cities around the global by using underground railroad maximum number of travelers in Tokyo, and minimum rates in Kyoto
To commence with, in 1863 the underground railroad system established and the passenger travelled 394 km in London and the number of participants is 775 million per year , In Paris the underground railroad made in 1900 and the individual traveled 199 km , but the rate of costumer is 1191 million per year, ,In Tokyo underground railway station recognized in 1976 ,or people traveled about 155 km , but the percentage of passengers higher then the whole
In contrast, the least one in Kyoto which is established in 1981 and the traveled rate is also minimum for whole
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response attempts to summarize the data but fails to accurately report the information provided. There are significant factual errors, such as misidentifying the opening date of the Tokyo system as 1976 (the table states 1927) and confusing the units of measurement (e.g., stating passengers traveled 394 km in London, when 394 refers to the route length). The overview is vague and lacks a clear comparison of the main trends. Key features, such as the contrast between older, larger systems and newer, smaller ones, are not clearly highlighted. The response lacks the precision required for an Academic Task 1 report.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and often misused, such as 'To commence with' and 'In contrast', which do not effectively link the ideas. Referencing is frequently unclear, and the flow between sentences is disjointed. The paragraphing is present but does not serve to group information logically, making the overall structure difficult to follow. The lack of clear transitions between the data points hinders the reader's ability to interpret the information.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is limited and contains numerous errors in word choice and spelling. Examples include 'rail way station' instead of 'railway system', 'costumer' instead of 'passengers', and 'global' used incorrectly as a noun. There is also significant confusion regarding terminology, such as using 'participants' to refer to passengers. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data accurately, and the frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'Landon', 'washin gton', 'los angele') detract from the clarity of the report.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response relies on simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences are consistently marred by grammatical errors. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement, incorrect preposition usage, and missing articles. For example, 'the underground railroad system established' is missing a passive auxiliary, and 'higher then the whole' is grammatically incorrect. Punctuation is also problematic, with erratic comma usage and inconsistent capitalization of proper nouns. These errors occur throughout the text and frequently impede the reader's understanding of the intended meaning.
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