Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Underground Railway Systems

City	Date opened	Kilometers of route	Passengers per year (in millions)
London	1863	394	775
Paris	1900	199	1191
Tokyo	1927	155	1927
Washington DC	1976	126	144
Kyoto	1981	11	45
Los Angeles	2001	28	50

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The table illustrates the underground railway systems in six cities included date opened, kilometers of route and passengers per years[in millions].

Overall, London is a vast majority of accounted kilomerers of route while, highest passengers per years have Tokyo.All country has open railway by the different date and and own route calculated.

Initialy, London make railway in 1863 around 394 km of the way at 775 milions people are used these way.Paries open in 1900 make the routeat 199 km in per years more than 1191 millions pasenger in paris. Tokyo represented more passenger went this way near by 1927 million in open 1927 by 155 km.

Regaeding ,Washington DC start in 1976 with 126 kilometers road around 144 millions individual traval by thus railway in per yeras.Kyota was shortest route with less passenger that route opened im 1981 at 11 km of the wat in only 45 million people. The last one is Los Angeles was 2001 maked 28km way and 50 millions individual.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover all parts of the task by mentioning the date opened, kilometers of route, and annual passengers for the six cities. However, the reporting of main features and comparisons is significantly hindered by numerous inaccuracies and confusing expressions. For instance, the student states that 'highest passengers per years have Tokyo', incorrectly equating the passenger volume (1,927 million) with the year opened (1927). While an overview is attempted, key trends—such as the inverse relationship between route length and passenger numbers in some cities—are not effectively highlighted. This performance aligns with Band 5, as the task is addressed only partially and key data points are misinterpreted or unclearly presented.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The text is divided into paragraphs, starting with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the cities. However, the overall progression is severely disrupted by awkward transitions, repetitive phrasing, and mechanical cohesive devices like 'Initialy', 'Regaeding', and 'The last one is'. Referencing is frequently unclear, as seen in sentences like 'Tokyo represented more passenger went this way near by 1927 million in open 1927 by 155 km.' Paragraphing is used, but the internal logical flow is difficult to follow. This corresponds to Band 4, where information and ideas are not arranged coherently enough to ensure smooth progression.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The student uses a very basic and repetitive vocabulary range, with frequent word choice and collocation errors, such as 'kilomerers of route', 'passengers per years', 'maked 28km way', and 'individual traval'. Words are often misused in terms of parts of speech or context (e.g., 'Paries open in 1900 make the routeat 199 km in per years more than 1191 millions pasenger in paris'). While the basic topic vocabulary (cities, dates, kilometers, passengers) is present, the frequent errors and restricted control put this firmly at Band 4, where vocabulary limitations strain the reader's understanding.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences dominate, and attempts at more complex structures are heavily flawed and ungrammatical, such as 'London is a vast majority of accounted kilomerers of route while, highest passengers per years have Tokyo.' There are persistent, highly intrusive errors in tense usage, word order, articles, and pluralisation (e.g., 'All country has open railway', 'Kyota was shortest route'). Grammatical errors are frequent throughout and frequently distort meaning, making it difficult for the reader to grasp the intended comparisons without referring back to the original table. This reflects Band 4 performance.

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