Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Underground Railway Systems

City	Date opened	Kilometers of route	Passengers per year (in millions)
London	1863	394	775
Paris	1900	199	1191
Tokyo	1927	155	1927
Washington DC	1976	126	144
Kyoto	1981	11	45
Los Angeles	2001	28	50

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The table below gives information of the underground railway systems in high developed six cities. The observations come from 1863 to 2001, a difference of almost a century.

In summary, we can see that London had 775 million passengers per year, even though, it was the first welcome of railway system in 1863. Furthermore, it has route, which is 394 kilometers, making it the longest route of all time. For Paris, it opened in 1900 with 199 kilometers route. Although, the route halved compared to the first railway, it shows that the passengers are doubled to 1191 million. After almost three decades, Tokyo introduced its railway system in 1927. This one is no different from the previous one in route length yet still boosted the passenger's number to 1927 million.

The largest passenger drop was in Kyoto, 1981, which decreased to 45 million. Due to the tiniest route of all time with 11 kilometers. Preceding that in 1976, Washington kept the traditional balance of route within 126 kilometers. However, number of passengers each year came down anyway with 144 million. As a result, Los Angeles had the same outcome in 2001. The route was 28 kilometers, almost had no change, even in passengers count, which was only 50 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You report figures for all six cities and identify useful contrasts, especially London’s longest route and Tokyo’s highest annual passenger total. However, the overview is not sufficiently clear or accurate: the opening mainly gives the date range, while the summary should highlight the broad patterns, such as older systems generally having longer routes and Tokyo carrying the most passengers. Some comparisons are misleading or unclear. Paris’s passenger figure is not double London’s, and Tokyo’s route is not “no different” from Paris’s (155 km versus 199 km). The discussion of Kyoto and Washington also describes a “drop” without a clear comparison. Select the most important extremes and compare the figures precisely to make the main features more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction to discussion of the cities, and it uses linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “After almost three decades,” and “However.” This gives the reader some sense of sequence. However, the overall progression is not consistently logical: the second paragraph moves from Kyoto back to Washington, and phrases such as “As a result” imply a cause-and-effect relationship between Washington and Los Angeles that the data do not establish. Some references, including “This one” and “the same outcome,” are also unclear. Group the cities by meaningful comparisons—such as older versus newer systems or highest versus lowest figures—and use transitions only where the relationship between points is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary relevant to describing data, including “route,” “passengers,” “introduced,” and “decreased,” and the reader can generally understand the intended comparisons. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. “High developed six cities,” “first welcome of railway system,” and “traditional balance of route” do not express the intended meanings clearly. “Passenger drop” is also unsuitable when describing a single figure without a stated earlier level for comparison. Use standard data-reporting language such as “highly developed cities,” “was inaugurated,” “route length,” and “recorded the lowest passenger total.” More precise vocabulary will help distinguish a figure’s size from a change over time.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and attempts at more complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “even though” and “Although.” However, complex structures are often incomplete or incorrectly punctuated. For example, “Although, the route halved compared to the first railway, it shows…” has faulty punctuation and an unclear clause relationship, while “Due to the tiniest route of all time with 11 kilometers” is a sentence fragment. There are also errors in articles and sentence construction, as in “it has route” and “the first welcome of railway system.” Aim to make each sentence grammatically complete, check article use, and connect dependent clauses directly to a main clause. Simpler, accurate comparisons would improve clarity while you build control of longer sentences.

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