Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The take below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Underground Railway Systems

City	Date opened	Kilometers of route	Passengers per year (in millions)
London	1863	394	775
Paris	1900	199	1191
Tokyo	1927	155	1927
Washington DC	1976	126	144
Kyoto	1981	11	45
Los Angeles	2001	28	50

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The take below shows information about the undergroung railway systems in six cities. I will explain the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and comparisons. Overall, the underground railway systems in given table. Tokyo, is the peak point in the cities. and the lowest point is kyoto. Looking at the details, London, the date opened in 1863 and the kilometres of route is 394 in the table the passengers per year in millions is 775. Paris, is the second city the date opened in 1900, and the route is 199 the travelers per year is increase in the table. Tokyo, the date opened in 1927 and the kilometres of route is 155 the travelers per year high rise in the table. In addition, Washington Dc the date opened is 1976 the route is 126 and travelers per year few low in the table. fourth city is kyoto, the date opened in 1981

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the topic and include an overview that attempts to highlight the highest and lowest systems, which is a relevant start. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: Tokyo has the most passengers, while London has the longest route; Kyoto has the fewest passengers and the shortest route. Several figures are omitted or not reported precisely, including the passenger totals for Paris and Tokyo, and the response ends before covering Los Angeles or Kyoto’s route and passenger figures. The comparison that Paris’s passenger number “is increase” does not communicate the data. The response also falls six words short of the 150-word minimum; the ten words copied from the task prompt are excluded from the count. To improve, report the key figures accurately and cover all six cities before concluding.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic sequence: an introduction, an attempted overview, and a paragraph beginning “Looking at the details.” Phrases such as “In addition” also signal a move to further information. However, the ideas are not arranged coherently enough to give a complete account. The city-by-city listing is interrupted by unclear statements such as “Tokyo, is the peak point,” and the final sentence stops after Kyoto’s opening date. Connections between the figures are limited, so the reader has to infer which city is being compared and what “high rise” or “few low” refers to. Grouping the oldest and largest systems separately from the newer, smaller ones, and using complete sentences with clear comparisons, would create stronger progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “underground railway systems,” “kilometres of route,” and “passengers per year,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which makes key comparisons difficult to understand. For example, “peak point” and “lowest point” do not clearly describe the data, while “travelers per year is increase” and “few low” are not suitable ways to report passenger totals. There is also a spelling error in “undergroung,” and “the take below” is an incorrect reference to the table. Use precise terms such as “highest annual passenger figure,” “shortest route,” and “carried” to describe the systems and their statistics.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, and the opening sentence communicates the general topic. However, sentence control is weak: many statements are fragments or contain faulty clause structure, as in “Overall, the underground railway systems in given table” and “London, the date opened in 1863 and the kilometres of route is 394.” Commas and full stops also divide ideas awkwardly, notably in “Tokyo, is the peak point in the cities. and the lowest point is kyoto.” There are recurring problems with articles, agreement, and verb forms, including “the date opened” and “the travelers per year is increase.” Build complete sentences around a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and punctuation when joining figures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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