Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some say that thae most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help each others i agree from this view i will summarise this view.

For, a human being rich is very important because, a rich man can build the hospitals where doctors do free treatment of poor patient and poor people can take the medicine from these hospitals a most rich person can better the society to helping each others a rich person can fix the water filters in his society and people can get neat clean and healthy water from these filters.

A rich person can build schools where the children of poor people can get free education and they can get many opportunities, a rich person can divide free food for two times and which people cannot afford thier food expenses they can get food from there easily a rich person can do the marraige of the daughters of poor people and he can afford every expense of her marraige.

I strongly believe that a rich person is very important for society and community because, the rich person can do everything which cannot do a poor person of s

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You take a clear position in favour of the view and give relevant examples, including free medical care, clean water, education and food for people in need. These examples show why wealth could enable someone to help others. However, the response addresses the task only partially: it mainly lists possible charitable actions and does not explain whether helping others is the most important benefit of being rich, or consider any other perspective. Several points are asserted rather than developed, and the final sentence is unfinished. The response contains 183 words, so it is 67 words below the 250-word minimum; 14 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop fewer examples with explanation and complete the argument.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an opening, examples of ways a wealthy person might help, and a concluding statement. The examples are generally related to the central position, so the reader can follow the broad topic. However, progression is limited because several ideas are joined into long strings with commas, rather than being organised into clear steps. Connectors such as “and” are repeated, while “For” does not introduce the following sentence naturally. References such as “these hospitals” and “there” are understandable but could be more precise. Use separate paragraphs for distinct reasons, and link each example to an explanation of why it supports your view. Finish with a complete conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use a small set of relevant words to discuss social support, including “free education,” “poor people,” “medicine” and “healthy water.” This makes the main examples understandable. However, the vocabulary is limited and repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “rich person” and “poor people,” and some word combinations are unnatural or unclear. For example, “divide free food” does not express the intended idea naturally, and “neat clean and healthy water” is repetitive. There are also spelling errors such as “thae,” “thier” and “marraige.” Build a wider range of accurate phrases for charitable support and social benefits, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Most sentences attempt to communicate a relevant idea, but the range of structures is limited and errors are frequent enough to make some passages difficult to follow. The opening runs several clauses together without appropriate sentence boundaries. In “the rich person can do everything which cannot do a poor person,” the clause lacks a clear subject and has an incorrect verb pattern. Other examples include “a rich man can build the hospitals” and “the children … can get free education,” where article use and sentence construction need attention. The final phrase, “of s,” is incomplete. Practise forming complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and use full stops to separate ideas before attempting longer compound sentences.

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